Embrace Life

Lift | Mighty List 2

Since I wrote out my first Mighty List in April 2012 I managed to accomplish a lot, I also managed to forget about the list while life had me focus on other things. It's time to regroup and figure out a new list, one that serves me better and takes into consideration all that I've learned in the past two years. 

Nowhere on my original list was "take private reformer Pilates classes" or "take kids on a Caribbean cruise" or "file every spec of paper in the house" - things I've done that have greatly enriched my life. I'm revisiting this project as I like the idea of a brain dump of things to accomplish before I am unable to accomplish anything else. Real big dream-to-goal things, not just a simple laundry list of chores. A true MIGHTY list.

On that same note, it's okay to LET GO of some things. Transcend from a bucket list format of catching every half formed thought or idea and embrace exactly who I am and what I want to do to enrich my mind, body and soul. To do that, truly honour who and what I am it was necessary to face some truths and my list reflects those realizations.

Some things remain, some things have changed - some things were actually accomplished from the original list. In no particular order, this is my new version:

1. Take a painting class - watercolours first - then oil and acrylic
2. Keep my Project Life up-to-date
3. Take a trip with stops in Morocco, Turkey and Italy for sure
4. Write - and publish - a novel
5. Choose my favourite blog posts and put them into book form
6. Find the root of the weight issue then lose it, enough to feel good again
7. Fix and cull all of the categories on my blog
8. Find a companion, a man who brings out the best in me, and me him
9. Submit 10 articles for publication - then have them published
10. Watch the opera - MET showings - at Silvercity
11. Take golf lessons - then golf as often as possible
12. Write a cookbook for my kids of all our favourite meals
13. Clear out the storage locker
14. Continue to model the behaviour I want to see in my children
15. Then model better
16. Take a creative writing course
17. Go indoor skydiving
18. Put together a library of all the creative courses I've taken - and finish the projects that still resonate
19. Feel rested and 100% well
20. The biggest "unattainable" dream in my life, ever: have an article published by Vanity Fair magazine
21. Read ALL of the books on my bookshelf
22. Purchase the exact outdoor couch I have pictured in my head (and not freak out about the ridiculous price)
23. Write a children's book - then write some more
24. Leave the house more and connect with people, even if it's just to sit in a restaurant and observe
25. Forgive myself for the ache my children suffer at the neglect of their father
26. Clear all of the clutter from each and every room in my home
27. Meditate and move daily
28. Buy a home on the Canyon Ranch Tucson property
29. Replace my entire wardrobe with clothes that fit properly and make me feel good
30. Take regular "photo walks" to someplace new and creatively evocative
31. Then compile a big coffee table book of photos and experiences
32. Organize ALL of the files on my computer
33. Go on one soul-filling retreat each month - writing, photography, quiet, creative
34. Take a trip to the UK and visit all of the places that resonate within me
35. Buy the Canon EOS 1-DX camera
36. Go snowshoeing
37. Watch Downton Abbey, Veronica Mars, The Good Wife, Breaking Bad, Suits, Friday Night Lights, Mad  Men, Six Feet Under, Freaks & Geeks
38. Turn my townhouse into a real honest-to-goodness townhouse with heavy doors, crown moulding and high baseboards
39. Find an accountant to get all of my finances in order and open The Next Chapter Studio
40. Learn to make "relief" pottery - then make a lot of it!

This list-in-progress reflects exactly who I am and what I want to include in my life.

What is on your Mighty List?

live a better life | don't feed the demons

[source]

I don't often go onto my "stats" page. Imagine my surprise when I was clicking around and realized over this past weekend that I was getting a ridiculous number of hits and page reads - starting last Thursday. We're talking in the area of 300+ per day. This, I can assure you, is not normal.

The good thing is I can see where the weird clicks are coming from and in this case it was a link from Two Peas in a Bucket. No, it was not a beautiful layout I had posted, it was an article I had written five years ago.

Ah yes. It's summertime. The annual dragging up of "the post".

What's the big deal? Once I realized where all the activity was coming from, I did not click through myself to see what was being said. Now, all of us familar with Two Peas know that, like too many a lot of online forums, the "General" Message Board is toxic and troll-filled. This suited my purpose perfectly when I originally posted my rant - which I posted on my blog at the time, as well. Then, like all things on a toxic message board, it burst well out of my control. People did not read my actual post, they read the comments and that is where they formed their opinions.

They were not kind.

As tempting as it was, I didn't need to relive that experience. Though there was a pull of curiosity*, I realized it would provide me with no positive or helpful information or insight.

This year I've chosen not to feed the demons.

What I found very interesting, of the hundreds of clicks here through the week there was not one comment left here for me to read. Did you agree? I don't know. Did you disagree? I don't know. Can we have a conversation? I guess not.

We all have moments of insecurity. I doubt myself often enough as the sole provider of four teenagers without having a few hundred people who don't know me at all making harsh judgments about me, my character and my parenting. 

The past couple of years, and indeed up until a couple of months ago I would have given into my curiosity*. Now? I know better. I am really learning to understand and embrace the concept that what others think of me really isn't any of my business. For those who found their way here, who want to have a conversation, let's have one. For those who don't, fine with me. I hope for those who spent over an hour and read over 100 pages that you learned what you think you needed to know.

What was that "famous" post?

Here it is:

13 June 2008

I am so looking forward to the end of the school year. Perhaps more than my kids are anticipating it! I cannot wait to spend some time with each of them ... and all of them!

Don't get me wrong. We do not experience the lazy days of summer as this season can be pretty hectic around here. There is no sleeping-in as most week days the kids are off to camp. This year camp includes: canoe, sports, adventure, basketball, soccer, leadership, golf, dance, theatre arts, baseball, sailing, archery, explorer, hockey, fitness, math, French and computers. Hey, I have four kids. It just looks like a lot ;)

We've also scheduled one "mama week" for each kid. They get to choose the agenda for the day for five days in a row. I've overheard conversations about visiting the Science Centre, R.O.M., Canada's Wonderland, Maid of the Mist in Niagara Falls, Art Gallery of Ontario, Royal Botanical Garden, a visit to the Hockey Hall of Fame, Butterfly Conservatory in Niagara. I'm kind of hoping Claire suggests some kind of a Spa Day! We may even go for an overnight visit someplace depending on the 3on3 hockey, baseball, dryland training schedules that are ongoing every evening. As most of my friends know, I am not adverse to taking a small trip - 4 hours one way - to visit family and friends overnight. Yes, consider that a warning!

Not only that, but we have friends coming in to visit with us from all parts! My kids are thrilled to meet new people and entertain. My friends are thrilled to have a chance to kick back, have a BBQ and enjoy a glass of wine (or four) and let their kids go. It's always good when they run in a pack: with Claire keeping everyone safe; and, Chloe ready to step in and either report or boss around.

We have a theme going here: busy is good; bored is bad.

We make the most of every minute. We play hard. We relax hard. Though there is some structure, it is, for the most part, pretty flexible and pretty easy going.

Okay, to the bee in my bonnet: What is wrong with all of these wretched mothers?

Stay at Home mothers who dread summer holidays? Teachers who don't want to spend more time with more children - hey, newsflash, these are your children in the summer! Worse? Caregivers who are taking care of working mother's children because they cannot take the time off leaving children in your care and you're crabbing about how awful it's going to be?

Get over it! Why have children if not to enjoy them, nurture them, have fun with them, spend time with them? Why offer to take care of other children if you don't like it?

I know there are times when being a parent is trying and exhausting. It's certainly not all sunshine and flowers around here, but hey, that was our choice to have four delightful monsters. It is your choice.

You made a mistake? Suck it up buttercup.

Don't let those kids feel like the worst thing in the world is them being around ruining your time. You think they don't feel it? You make comments in the grocery line, to your friend at the park, to your sister on the phone, to your on line friends, at the ballpark or soccer field, to other mothers at after school pick-up, to your husband at the top of your lungs (with the door closed, of course), at the community pool, everywhere you think people are willing to hear you whine about how wretched your life is going to be for the nine weeks of summer holiday.

You think those children don't hear you? They don't feel it?

Come on. Be the GROWN UP. You are responsible for them. For nine weeks it is NOT ABOUT YOU. Deal.

Or even, dare I say it? Enjoy!

Originally published here: http://l2l-lemons2lemonade.blogspot.ca/2008/06/latest-bee-in-my-bonnet.html

Like I said, it served it's purpose at the time. Would I write the same thing now? For the most part, yes. Some of the words might change, but the concept would stay the same.

What about you? Agree? Disagree?

*curiosity = demon

Change of Scene

This was my view over the past 10 days:

as my sister Beth and I walked to breakfast. Hot sun, cool breeze, clear skies. Sigh.

This was my view this morning:

Welcome home!

I miss the Arizona weather, great food made by someone else, the company of my sister and endless activities; but, in the same breath, I'm so happy to be home with my family. I've never been away that long. It was the perfect trip at the perfect time.

I have to ponder a few things and then share all that I learned. There is just so much ratting around in my head! It needs some time to settle.

Guess what? I returned to a clean house! My family went bonkers while I was away and it is a joy to have fresh flowers on the sparkling clean glass kitchen table. That is where I sit, right now, watching the fog as it does it's best to stick around.

Today is going to be busy:

1000+ photos to edit
1000+ blog entries in my Google reader
1000+ ideas rattling around in my head
1000+ calories to burn today

and no doubt 1000+ other things to do.

I'm off to make a list :) The best way to ground myself and get back into the swing of things.

Happy Wednesday!

Wellness Wednesday: Source of Discomfort

or evil. It all depends on your perspective.

[WARNING: This post may have TMI for some]

I have never had a finicky stomach, in actual fact, I can pretty much eat anything and not have it bother me. After years of boarding school, university and my first few years of enduring my own cooking, that was a good thing!

Those days are gone.

Over the past five weeks I've been having terrible pains: up-all-night, writhing-and-retching, almost-as-bad-as-childbirth pain which required me to pass out to sleep. I know I could have, and probably should have, gone to the doctor but I'm a bit stubborn and I was determined to find the cause myself. (It turns out, I did exactly what my doctor would have told me to do anyway - process of elimination).

The source of my pain:

Marble cheese. The reality? All cheese.

I have to say this makes me terribly sad. Now that I've read everything there is to read on cheese allergies, it may be the answer to a number of my recent health issues. Only time will tell. I will miss my Oka and my Brie, but I may welcome more comfort and less bloat. Fingers crossed!

So to all of you who have enquired as to my health (especially over on Facebook where I've been whining the most), thank you! I think I finally have it figured out. I appreciate your notes, your advice and your encouragement.

* * * * *

On another topic entirely, in answer to my plea posed on my September in Review, the lovely Becky from San Diego sent me a note suggesting I pick up some Emu Oil. Huh?

So I did.

So far it's working. And a bonus for me is that it is working on clearing up my psoriasis, too. (I know, we're a collection of medical annoyances!) I've also picked up some aqueaous cream suggested by Amy. Some how we'll manage to get this beat. My poor girl can't even sleep with the pain of it all. In case you are not aware: teenagers who do not get sleep are CRANKY.

* * * * *

I'm taking some advice from a girlfriend (thanks, Elaine) based on a lunch conversation we had a couple of weeks back. The fact is, over the last six months or more I've been doing a lot of healthy eating and healthy exercise and still not losing any weight. In actual fact, I have been gaining. My only indulgence - cheese - has recently been eliminated! I've endured a number of tests (thyroid) and though the tests all come out "normal" I continue to wonder.

Some years back I switched to Kosher and Sea salt in my kitchen. I don't add salt to my food and my girlfriend pointed out that there's a pretty good chance that my iodine levels are bad and that would effect my thyroid.

Hmm.

Now, admittedly, neither of us have vast medical knowlege; but I'm thinking this might be an avenue to pursue. Who knows.

* * * * *

So there ends the summary of my current battles! If you know or can further my knowlege of cheese allergies, eczema/psoriasis or benefits of iodine in any way, let me know!

Live A Better Life: Get Feedback

As I've shared, I've been participating in the 30 Days to Live a Better Life Challenge and it has been a fascinating journey thus far. I anticipate learning much more in the days to come :)

TODAY is the day I need YOUR FEEDBACK!

I am looking for those of you who read my blog who are able to give me honest and objective feedback in my search to discover a new level of awareness about myself. Please leave your signed comments in the comment section, or, if you are uncomfortable doing that, feel free to e-mail me your observations to leecurrie at cogeco dot ca. It will take about 15 minutes and I appreciate, very much, your time and insight!

(This exercise is about me being a better me. You, kind reader, may want to err on being polite and think there’s nothing I need to work on, but this exercise is about being a better person by way of being a better blogger and if you can share with me your insight, it would be greatly appreciated.)

In terms of me as a blogger:

1. How am I as a blogger?
2. What are some things I can improve on? (It can be anything, from hard skills, to personality, to certain habits) There are always areas I can improve, so spill!
3. Is there anything you’d like me to stop doing? What is it? Why?
4. Is there anything I do that’s good and you want me to continue on? What is it? Why?
5. Have I ever done anything that made you unhappy before? If so, what is it? How do you think I could have handled it better?

As part of the exercise we have been asked to pose these same questions to people who populate what we consider to be the three most important roles we play. This is my most public role, as blogger. I will be asking the exact same questions of those four who call me mother and four women who call me friend.

Thanks for participating! I am looking forward to reflecting on your answers.

 

September Challenge: Live a Better Life

A week or so ago I read the most amazing entry over at The Personal Excellence Blog which inspired my Living Life Project you will find over on the right ---> and was hopeful when Celes mentioned that she was considering a challenge as a spin off of that post.

Guess what?

I've joined the Live A Better Life in 30 Days Challenge!

I've found the loosey-goosey days of summer, though mostly enjoyable, have not been particularly inspiring or motivating. I really need something to get me up and going in a cerebral sense. Hell, I really need something to get me up and going, period!

I like the idea that this is a mindful challenge. I don't have to remember to take photos, I don't have to created something new and original, what I have to do is execute a task then I am to journal my insights. So, my plan is to set aside 30-minutes each morning to focus on the assignment. Given that this is an all-month challenge, to be consistent, I'll shoot for a 9AM start, that way everyone will be delivered at school prior to my start. Though Celes tells us to do the assignment in the morning, we will receive it in the evening as each morning her time (6AM Singapore) is, according to my handy dandy time zone converter, 6PM Toronto time - the day before. I like the idea that I have overnight to mull the task. We all know how much I enjoy my mull!

I love the idea that at the end of 30 days there will be 30 journal entries. Who knows what might be created? I find this entering on blind faith, on being a faithful reader of Celes blog, I am confident that this will be a worthwhile exercise.

At best, I learn something about myself and it can be the launch pad for other things. At worse, it will be a continuation of my 70 Days of Summer project in that it will keep me focused on something constructive! As for the Living Life Project I've highlighted, I'm hoping to use this exercise as a launch pad for me to address some of the good, the bad and the not so good highlighted on that page.

Have you joined in? If not, are you going to?