Embrace Life

Project Life | 2014

Last June I moved my Project Life to a private blog* which made a lot of sense, and continues to make sense. Now that I'm starting a new year of Project Life, I considered just putting it back here on the primary blog but was reminded that the process had become inauthentic as I was not comfortable sharing all of the people and intimate details of the lifes shared by me and my children.

For me, Project Life is exactly what it is - representative of my life. In fits and starts. Better than nothing and far from perfect. Sounds about right!

There are a few things I'll be updating this year:

A new private blog for 2014 pages is set up. If you're interested in reading it, send me a note at linarstudio dot lc at gmail dot com and I'll get the password off to you. Anyone interested will have access by clicking the navigation bar ^ above.

I've decided, after a few successful experiments though this past year, that I'll be printing my book at the end of the year via Blurb in a 12" x 12" format. No muss, no fuss. Even better? No glare of page protectors, no lumpy bumpy, no elements to organize. Less time wasted on stuff and more time focused on recording and creating!

After much flip-flopping, the format will continue to be 12" x 12" and I'll be using Cathy Zielske's new Life Basics Minimal templates as I prefer the straight edges for the photos and journaling.

I enjoyed Museo Slab as my font last year as I like the readability. I think I'll continue with it, in different weights, through the project this year. I'll have to figure out a script font - maybe - if I need it.

The big decision? I played around with the idea of changing the dates to have the weekends included from week to week, having the weeks run Monday through Sunday but the reality is my life runs from Sunday through Saturday. If there is a special event that takes place on a weekend there is absolutely nothing stopping the idea of putting it in between the weeks as a 2-page spread. Indeed, that might be fun keeping a few 12" x 12" spreads of non-Project Life ideas in the finished book. This seems to be the big internal argument each year.

A few years ago, in my wildest imaginings, I'd never have thought I'd go 100% digital - in anything memory-keeping related. At best I thought I'd be a hybrid scrapbooker. Things have changed so much and access is so much easier in Canada to digital product whereas traditional product is so much harder to find and the premium for shipping (and counter space) is becoming absurd.

I still have oodles of goodies and hope to use them in smaller projects - maybe A Week In The Life, Recipe Books and Gratitude projects. I can't forget to get my latest December Daily put together!

I love memory keeping. My kids enjoy it too. Over the years they have learned it's value. Even Claire, who used to give me such a terrible time about posing for photos, now returns home from university on occasion and is far less grumbly about having her photo taken. I love that they "get" it and also know that I'm not going to stop, so they smile nicely the first time and then we don't have to keep at it shot after shot!

Since I am an "everyday" scrapbooker, they have plenty of opportunity to smile nicely for the camera - and me, too!

* This decision had much to do with the divorce proceedings and my not wanting their long-absent father to portray himself as anything more than who he is. You can't parent via blog post at the same time acquaintances should not know more about what is going on than a parent. So awkward. By removing access, I had hoped I could have forced the concept of parenting by direct communication and engagement. It did not work. The second reason was to protect private extended-family things: big newsworthy events and proud moments, sad happenings, big group photos of people we love. I figured it was best to maintain the privacy of those who don't live here on the internet.

real right now | christmas lights

Things change.

Things stay the same.

Big change: Claire was not home to help us put out the Christmas lights this year. Truly? She is usually the one in charge directing everyone and then moves in making everything "perfect" when we do not do as we're told.

Big same: [Insert any name here] well, [Caden] was not happy with the idea of going out in the freezing cold to put out the Christmas lights. He had a full-on exhasperated and angsty hormone-filled fit. Luckily his mama has "the look" down :) No, he was not dressed for the -8C temperature. Yes, he remembered all of his unfinished homework. Displeased? Totally. I suppose this year was his turn.

Is Caden simply not helping or perhaps (mama thinks, hopefully) he's taking mental notes for the years ahead when he'll be doing this job by himself?

Ah yes, the smile belies the cold fingers!

Thankfully, helpful Hanne (Cole's lovely squeeze for the last six months or so) was around to do the hard work on the uncooperative dogwood tree!

Chloé was diligent, knowing if she worked quickly it would just get done! She must have been frozen in her pajama bottoms. Yes, it was that kind of day!

Ah yes, Mr. Angst. At least he remembered how to (kind of) pose nicely for a photo.

It was very brisk outside, I was happy for the sunshine! I can't believe the youngers didn't put on heavier clothes. Sigh. We were about 10 feet away from the front door, so I suppose they would have gone inside if it were unbearable. But brr. I look at the photos and remember the cold!

Happy Season of Twinkly Lights!

the current | thirty-three

dateline: oakville, ontario, canada @ 9:31pm on november 20, 2013
weather outside: winter is on it's way!
mood inside: frazzled and a bit out-of-sorts

drinking perrier with a slice of lemon. in a wine glass. today has been a long, lovely, day!

eating steel cut oats every morning, i prefer it with raisins and walnuts. yum. thinking about adding in some cranberries, too.

embracing new ideas. this is exciting!

enjoying the challenge involved with dreaming up a new business and plan.

cooking lots in the crock pot and bbq while waiting for delivery of the new double oven range.

trying to stay focused and avoiding the temptation to go down the technology or pinterest rabbit hole.

missing what happened to 2013. blink. it's almost gone!

feeling proud of myself for attending regular (2x) weekly reformer pilates classes. i can really feel the difference. it's great!

listening to the silence of my house. my kids are studying or sleeping.

watching our local news. oh rob ford - put the city of toronto first you narcissistic buffoon! what a nauseating display.

reading about all that is required of me as a leader of danielle laporte's desire map book club: the biggest book club ever. i can't wait to get started! what are you doing on january 7th? join in here.

wearing layers. always layers. my body is currently going through some wonky temperature fluctuations! hormones, phewy.

packing scrapers, blankets and emergency supplies into the truck. it's that time of year, for sure!

planning how to decorate for christmas this year. i'm thinking it's time to change things up a bit and have a more "grown up" feel to the house. including pretty breakables! pottery barn? crate & barrel? restoration hardware? inside? outside? big? small? whole house? living room/dining room only? i might be talking myself out of it altogether!

feeling relaxed and calm. i'm finally in a groove. just in time for the end of term! it figures. just in time for things to change up again!

stopping the habit of busy. some of the meanest people i know describe themselves as "busy". i do not want to be that.

wanting to have a fun conversation with an adult - preferably one with a deep, masculine voice who enjoys football :) caden's crackly baritone is enjoyable, but a change might be nice ;)

needing to be a bit more patient with myself on so many levels.

wishing for healthy, active and engaged days ahead.

waiting is not something i'm very good at doing. but i am trying hard to be patient and use my time constructively :)

thinking of going away with claire in february for her reading week - someplace hot and quiet. now where should we go? ideas?

enjoying learning how to use my new pendulums. this is becoming a fascinating journey and i'm learning so much!

paying for too many years sitting at a desk. i've been moving and stretching but have to realize it took years to get this creaky. it's going to take some effort to make everything move like it should!

encouraging my kids to be calm as they prepare for their upcoming exams. breathe in - 2 - 3 - out - 2 - 3 and again. and again.

celebrating how uncomplicated our lives have become. wonderful.

cultivating a practice of self-care and meditation. daily. my priorities are shifting and it's a good thing.

marveling at how quickly time flies and how my kids are growing into lovely and thoughtful young adults with lives of their own.

anticipating a lot of hard decisions ahead. on the lighter side, what creative projects will i choose? #reverb14? one little word? still life photography? desire map for life? project life 2014? week in the life? revive 12 of 12? the biggest book club, ever? keep up with the blog? join the circle of fire?

and tada, a photo from my week:

 

Project | Thirty +1 Days of Thankful

I have a few flaws - some louder than others. I am doing my best to take a good look at them and change what I can or maybe just change my outlook and some of those flaws might not be "bad" after all.

The first thing to do is admit you have a problem. Right? Well, okay: I AM A PROJECT JUNKIE. To be honest, one of my biggest most consistent flaws is that of the "the unfinished project". I am REALLY GOOD at starting things. There are so many good ideas, I jump from one to another - to another - to another. Sometimes they are just started and I drop them because they didn't turn out to be what I expected. Sometimes there is that one "perfect" element needed to finish it off. Sometimes they are just waiting to be simply uploaded and/or printed to be completed and yet they sit in my computer. Very few meet the stage of finished. 100% done.

Today, I celebrate a triumph! I am sharing a 100% finished project.

This was a simple get-it-done, a 100% no-brainer project. The brilliant Cathy Zielske has her annual Thirty Days of Thankful project available over at Designer Digitals. I LOVE this project - it was one of the projects I finished last year: Thankful 2012.

I have so much in my life for which to be grateful, it is important for me to recognize and express it. The best way possible is via my favourite format: pictures + words.

Of the three options available, I chose the 6"x8" template and went so far as to order the Handbook Album System from Studio Calico. Then it occured to me that I've always wanted to order a bound book - a real honest to goodness printed book rather than an album. Could I do it? Could I "get over" my gutter issues?

I did!

This envelope arrived, only 5-days after the book was ordered:

WOW. Anything arriving completed, to Canada from anywhere is outrageously wonderful!

The pages are stunning. I am so pumped about this book!

Just click on any of the images below to make larger.

 

Do you participate in a Gratitude Project? Which one? For what are you most grateful this day? month? year? Could you, like me, have written pages and pages, or do you keep things pretty tight - maybe a top three? How do you honour those you feel fortunate to have in your life?

Spill!

things we do | week in the life 2013

For the last few years I've participated in the Ali Edwards-inspired Week In The Life project, with varying degrees of success through each effort. I enjoy the project as it really gives me a here-and-now look at my life and gives me the focus I need to really realize what I want to keep, what I don't need anymore and where I want to go with things for me and my kids.

As with any creative endeavour there are tons of ideas when projects start.

• Do I incorporate my Week in the Life into my Project Life?
• Do I participate at the same time as the project is "assigned" or choose another time?
• Do I make the project 12x12 or 8.5x11? Will it be digital or traditional paper and glue?
• Will I put it in its own album or will I print it via Blurb or some other publishing place?
• Will I use Ali Edwards' templates or some other inspiration?
• What will my colour theme be?

So many choices!

This year, as in the last couple, I am hoping to keep things simple:

• I will participate in this project on the designated dates - Monday, September 9 through Sunday, September 15, 2013, using Ali's handy-dandy daily document sheets.
• This will be a project separate from Project Life with Ali Edwards' 8.5x11 templates to be completed 100% digitally.
• Once done, I'll print them off at Persnickety Prints to fill an empty album just waiting on the shelf. (I'm doing my best to use what I have left - a lot of albums and page protectors!)
• You can only plan so much in advance. I think I'll let the days dictate colour, but I'm thinking of basing everything in simple gray or brown with only pops of colour here and there - visually calm and easy with a few words that reflect feeling more than actions.

You know the Arthur Ashe quote: "Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can." That seems to be my motto and I shall continue to embrace it.

My past projects look like this:

2012 :: 23 April - 29 April 2012
2011 :: Monday - Friday :: Saturday :: somehow I missed Sunday - c'est la vie!
2010 :: 19 April - 25 April 2010
2008 :: 20 October - 26 October 2008

I'm looking forward to documenting my week! What about you?

things we do | share

Like most of us, I spend plenty of time on the computer. Between blogs, Facebook, TED, Pinterest and various other sites, there is plenty to learn without ever leaving home :) For someone who is very curious, this can prove to be quite a distraction!

For years now, I've received random paper clippings from the New York Times, Wall Street Journal and Globe & Mail from my dad. Sometimes there is a note, sometimes not. They are always something he thinks would interest me. Fortunately for me I have a Dad who knows me well enough that usually he's right :)

As a result, one of my favourite things to do is find internet nuggets and share them with my kids. No stamps required! I do love technology and the ability to share things with them quickly via e-mail. I even have Pinterest boards dedicated to the olders and their interests. I enjoy how these things keep me connected with them - and them with me.

Lately we've shared:

A TED Talk that might turn every man who watches it into a feminist: Jackson Katz, PhD and another that seems very topical around here: Rita Pierson.

22 Amazing Places - and they're right, it's hard to believe they exist!

A lesson on on how not to say the wrong thing everyone should learn well.

Sad news that our favourite sportscasters are moving Stateside!

The latest subjective list of the world's greatest restaurants.

"Slash" as slang not a simple punctuation mark. Sigh, this is my life.

Pinterest board for Claire and for Cole. There will be one for both Chloé and Caden - once they get Pinterest accounts!

There is always something interesting and fun!

hello monday | 67

hello family. i am the eldest of five sisters and mother's day is a big deal in our world. i am so happy for what has become one of the best days of our year.

hello dogwood. the only things i miss from our old house is the view of the lake and the beautiful, if flawed, dogwood in our yard. i can't do much about the view, but a new dogwood is enjoying it's first spring blooms in front of our home.

hello sore feet! i had forgotten how tough it is to wear heels for hours on end. thinking it might be nice to indulge in a soak and a pedicure.

hello concert season. it has begun! claire is off to the killers this week. love that she enjoys concerts as much as i did as a kid. good choices in music, too!

hello breath. hoping to exhale. soon.

hello long weekend plans. weird spring. it feels like the snow just melted and now we're heading into the start of summer party weekend! oh yeah, that's right, that's exactly what happened.

hello birthday. my baby boy will be a teenager next week. i'm hoping to cook up some plans for his big day. this should be good!

hello bathroom. almost done. whoot!

hello universe. thanks for all of the great tests lately. i do believe i'm passing. with flying colours. can we dial it back for the summer? thanks!

hello monday. you are my most favourite day of the week.
i love that you provide me with 52 fresh starts every year.

 

what are you saying hello to on this brand new monday?
head on over to lisa's blog and link up in the comments.

Family | Grandpapa

Taken: 5 November 2005, Fifties Diner, Oakville, ON

As I arrived in Arizona, Claire let me know her dad had left to go see his father. Grandpapa had been diagnosed with lung cancer. It was sad news indeed. Guy had, over the last 20 years, cheated death on a regular basis. We agreed to break the news to everyone else upon my return. Alas, plans are not always convenient for the universe. I returned to a quiet and sleeping house, and after three hours sleep, I woke to Cole responding to his learning on Facebook that his beloved grandfather had passed away.

Over the last week we've been piecing together, as best we can, the circumstances and plans.

It has lead to a number of interesting conversations. My belief is that a funeral is for the living - you attend to celebrate with those you love the life of the beloved who has passed away. Others believe a funeral is for the dead - to show respect.

I've let my children make up their own minds as to how they best want to honour their Grandpapa.

Guy was a lovely man with a kind heart. We will miss him.

challenge | big question 2

At the end of August, to celebrate the launch of her new virtual home, Tiffany Moore asked a number of her favourite bloggers to answer some BIG questions. I have been looking for a challenge and decided to take a stab at this particular exercise.

* * * * *

What is most sacred to you?

My relationship with my children.

This was the first thing that entered my head when I read the question. Then I checked out dictionary.com and their defininition: "worthy of or regarded with reverence, awe, or respect" confirmed it.

The only thing I ever wanted to be when I grew up was a good mother. I believe that is often the case for those of us raised by a not-so-good mother. Coming from such a negative experience, the last thing I would ever wish upon my children would be the same sense of abandonment or cruelty I experienced as a child.

I am raising them, alone, with as much love, support, common sense, consistency, patience, respect and boundaries as I can manage. In return they provide me with constant challenge, laughter, questions, energy, frustration and concern. I wouldn't change anything for the world. Our relationships are all different and complex and sacred. I am forever blessed to have them in my life.

They, all four of them, are worthy of my reverence, awe and respect.

Go see what Carolyn Rubenstein had to say when she was posed this question.

Re-entry | Spring Break is Over

The third term has begun.

Spring Break is over and we've taken the last couple of days to savour all of the goodness of our break, share the fun stories and recover from any residual jet lag. It was a very busy three weeks:

My boys went to spend some time in Florida with Grampy and Nanna. They learned some golf, visited with some loggerhead turtles, met some fascinating characters, swam every day and ate incredibly tasty food!

Claire and 20 of her classmates went (a day late due to Air Canada work-to-rule nonsense) on a senior arts trip to Europe with stops in London, Paris, Milan, Florence, Rome, Vatican City and Pompeii with a return flight through Munich.

Chloé joined me and a friend on a trip to Las Vegas where we saw a show, visited animals and walked (and walked, and walked). It was wonderful.

Along the way we ran into some events that make our everyday lives full: startling coincidences found on Facebook, leaky water connections, school started (for one), cancelled midnight movie showings, relationships end, software was updated, new appliances greatly appreciated, digital photos purged, hockey season ended, Hunger Games watched - sometimes twice!, football season began, the daughter still wants to drive the truck (eek!), plans are made to go back to the desert, an iPad3 was purchased and forms were completed.

As of 8:45AM today, I will be alone with my thoughts - and plenty to catch up on!

Onward! We are all looking forward to plenty of good stuff!

CLAIRE: will be attending "evaluations" for Little League baseball this weekend. After a too-long absence, she is anxious to return to baseball this Spring. In addition to that she will be playing for her school softball team. I am looking forward to seeing her perform in Rent after endless hours of rehearsal. That's the "fun" stuff. Her focus continues to be on her studies and she has a couple of marks she needs to concentrate on in order to get the average she wants going into her graduating year next year.

COLE: will be heading off to the rugby pitch to play for the local Crusaders team - he will also participate on his school team. He's also been asked to help coach the D-Line for his brother's football team. Cole enjoyed football and is more than willing to assist - especially with fitness drills! He is indulging in his newfound love for acting and it's a joy to pick him up after his classes. I am doing my best to focus on all that is good for Cole this year.

CHLOE: is finishing up her year with the Oakville Children's Choir. As Lead Alto she's had a lot to do but has asked to move onto other musical pursuits. She'll continue private voice lessons with Janet, but may join Cole over at West End to round things out. Her plan was to be in the Middle School play and had actually made it to the final cut, but ended up moving to the chorus. I've advised her to go onto "tech crew" and learn how things go behind the scenes.

CADEN: has just finished hockey and it couldn't happen soon enough - it was the first year of "hitting" and all it did was confirm my belief that it should be something inherent to the game from the start. An "introduction" makes it a far bigger deal and it really shouldn't be. He's working hard at school to make the transition to Appleby as easy as possible. This Spring he'll be playing football - with his brother as assistant coach. This should be interesting!

MAMA: has endless hours in the truck! That and many photos to edit, in my near future.

What about you? Anything planned for Spring?

Cape Cod 2011 | The Pages

This year, I decided to create an all-digi photo-based album to celebrate our visit to Cape Cod this summer. Other than deciding on the size: 8.5"x11" and the occasional template: Cathy Zielske, of course; I let the photos determine the stories and the size.

Now that it's complete the album is made up of 40+ pages of photos + words. I'm not sure if I'm going to send it out and put in a bound book or maybe printed out and slipped into page protectors. I shall continue to mull. The "hard" part is done. Most of them you can see below:

There are a few pages of pure journaling. Each of the kids has a page of their own with their personal reflections on their time away and I have a couple as well. 

It is so nice to head back to some place so familiar each year. I'm sure if this was a once-only event the album would look much different, but as it is, so much has already been photographed and said in previous versions that this is a simple continuation of an experience we love.

(I can't believe I finished this post on August 3rd and completely forgot to publish it. I just found it in my Drafts folder! Eek!)

Thankful Thought | Series 04

In our lives the only constant is change. Even when you expect, and make every effort to live a simple static existence, so much happens to change your perspective and your space. That's life.

Thinking of things around me, I am thankful for the few events that stay the same: the traditions of my family. There are two events each year, to which we - all five daughters with our families - cannot miss. One is Christmas which is celebrated the week before holiday week and the other is Mother's Day.

Even with those traditions in place and practiced year after year, things never stay the same! Those in attendance change as relationships evolve, children arrive and then have the nerve to grow up, husbands come and go.

It is still nice to know that in early May each year our kids get to visit with all of the cousins and with their aunts and grandparents. The daughters get a chance to catch up and marvel over how our kids are all growing up. Photos are taken of all the different groups that make up our crazy extended family. The men all gather together and talk about men-stuff (I imagine, since I just see them gathered in another room!) Delicious food and wine is consumed topped off with fancy desserts. Flowers inside and out are absolutely stunning in their abundance. Small gifts are exchanged - if, of course, you don't forget them on the chair at your front door. Ahem, guilty!

What about you? What is your thankful thought today?

Reflections | April 2011

Like every month, April was full. Unlike most months, it was highly emotional with many victories and an equal many disappointments. I am often left breathless with the disrespect and cowardice of some people and then overwhelmed with the inherent kindness and generosity of others. This month was one of extremes.

• A lot of technology changes around the house: no more voice mail, call waiting or mailbox; amped up the high speed and the digi capacity; and, changed the satellite services. Saved some money, paid some money. But finally got services that work, for us.
• Enjoyed a volunteer appreciation evening for the hockey association. So good to see hard work and dedication be appreciated and rewarded.
• Chloe joined the Oakville Children's Choir at the retreat centre in north Oakville as part of their recruitment efforts. It was a short visit, but fun.
• Early in the month, Cole's schedule opened up enough that he was able to head over to BTNL on a more regular basis. When they were around to open the door.
• Caden joined his friends for a sleepover and then a morning at their church. For Christmas they had given him a graphic novel bible and ever since he has been fascinated. He loves church.
• Pub nights continue. Love spending time with our friends.
• Caden had his end of season hockey party. What a great bunch of kids and parents. So many stories this season. Lots of laughs, too!
• Can I tell you how nice it is to live in a country that has an election campaign that runs for just little over a month - 36 days to be exact. Election is set for May 2nd. No exhausting American-style election bash and trash marathon.
• Not only that, but for one French debate, when the choice was hockey or politics? Hockey won and the date was changed for the debate. Only in Canada!
• I had my first real dose of pre-posting crazy. Hopefully everyone enjoyed what went up from the 11th through the 27th! I was also computer-free for much of that whole time. THAT was hard!
• Caden participated as the computer programmer in the Halton Skills Competition. His school team did really well! He's so pumped.
• Mid-month, Chloe and the choir spend 14 hours driving to, performing at, and coming home from a competition in Stratford. Chloe had a great time and was chosen as a soloist. She has a beautiful strong voice, and loves using it!
• More church for Caden! I wonder who will be recruited to take him when P and family move to North Carolina in the summer?
• I had a project featured over at Ella.
• The birds, holy smokes, are they ever LOUD. I swear every single bird in our town wakes up in my back yard. What a noise!
• I flew to Tucson with my sister and spent 10 Days and the world renown Canyon Ranch figuring out things.
• While on my way to my holiday, changing planes in Chicago, I got word that Cole - a day late - was cut from his hockey team and left with no options. Well, he had options, but that would have meant doing something mean to someone else, and that is really no option at all.
• It took a lot of effort to get on the connecting plane to Tucson.
• But I'm glad I did and a new journey has begun.
• In the meantime, back in Oakville, kids went to school, hung out with friends, did laundry, made meals and kept house.
• Tryouts continued and Cole is with one of his closest friends again - they had been together 2 years ago. Even better, his best buddy from last year is also on the same team. Always, always, look on the bright side of life. If I can give my children nothing else, I want them to learn and live in the knowledge there is always a bright side.
• The youngers were given, with many guidelines, Facebook accounts. 
• Chloe spent a lot of time with her buddy Kayla and Louis got to know her parents and learned how to manage her "playdate" logistics - and made plans for everyone else.
• Louis got a real dose of parenting in a quick 10 days mid-month. Claire and her boyfriend of almost a year called it quits - well, he did; Cole was blindsided; Chloe and Caden are social butterflies with lots of plans and places to go; there really was very little down time.
• I returned home with renewed energy and purpose - and a clean house!
• Claire attended a show choir with one of her good friends and she might join in next season.
• All of the house was disappointed the Habs did not beat Boston to advance in the Stanley Cup playoffs. Around here this does not mean they stop watching hockey! We're in for the duration.
• Looks like it's going to be a very stormy spring, though I'm hoping it won't be as devastating as the storms earlier in month down south. Scary stuff.
• Claire was in a big performance at school and it was lovely to watch and support her and her friends on stage. Bravo to them for doing such a great job!
• Everyone was up ridiculously early to watch the Royal Wedding. Lots of pomp and ceremony - a great history lesson without getting caught up in the history part.
• And wasn't Kate's dress ridiculously elegant? So lovely and understated.
• Caden decided to run for class Prime Minister - again. Apparently they do this every term. I wonder what crazy slogan he's going to come up with this time! His campaign is even shorter than the national one.
• We missed the deadline for a field trip, the first time ever the form wasn't handed in on time. Chloe will never forget! So I'm coming up with a field trip of our own.
• Caden is in the middle of try outs for the school track and field team. If the kids are chosen based on enthusiasm he'll make it for sure!

Holy smokes, that was a lot of stuff! Great stuff. Rotten stuff. Life is full. Life is good.

Onward into May which will bring my participation in StoryADay, LOAD, WholeHearted Living, May Merriment and One LIttle Word. Those are just the few things I can remember off the top of my head! I'm sure there is plenty more I'd like to do, if only partly, to gain the experience and embrace the inspiration.

The kids have tons of activities starting up!

I wonder how the great plans for May can go awry?

Family | What's in a name?

Sometimes I haven't quite decided on the final format for some stories I want to tell. The blog is the perfect place to house them until I figure it out. So with your indulgence, this is one of those stories ...

Family | What's in a NAME?

We have four mostly-wonderful-most-of-the-time kids. They were all born in the span of five years with the first arriving in December 1995 and the last in May 2000. Each has a very different story of how they came into the world but suffice it to say they were all: planned (I know, what was I thinking?); very different in temperament (not much has changed); and, unique in looks from each other.

Though they all had different journey's, for the most part, the pregnancies - all high risk - were pretty routine. Probably the best thing was my being on my own throughout all of them. I had no opportunity to depend on anyone as my husband was out of town and we did not live near family. Since I had no opportunity to wallow or give in to overwhelm, I had a lot of time to think about the most important question of all: what would we name them?

Naming a child is such a major decision as it shapes their identities and helps form the assumptions that are made by others. It is such a ridiculous practice to saddle the recipient of the name with judgements and assumptions, but it happens all the time by people as diverse as the school yard bully to the minister who baptises babies to the opinions and expectations of grandparents.

Above and beyond that pressure, I had some pretty rigid standards:

One syllable was important as my husband has a pretty long, difficult to spell, harder to pronounce, French-Canadien name. All names had to be simple and easy to spell and pronounce.

Gender specific was important as having a masculine name - Lee - in the early 70's, specifically the years of Lee Majors and the Six Million Dollar Man, in a word, sucked. Can I tell you how many times I was asked about which of my body parts were "bionic"? Though, in business it was fun, especially being in the grocery industry and having men show up for meetings and being flabbergasted that I was a female. Fun times! Many male French names ring a bit feminine to me (Michel, Daniel, Philippe, Etienne, etc), so those were out, too. The kids would all be given strong but gender specific names.

Middle names are a tradition in my husband's family with both his mum and dad called by their middle name, as I am called my mine. (Trivia question: what is my first name?) My mother in law also tells a story that Louis' name is backward and his middle name was supposed to be Louis, not Gilles - but they messed it up on his birth certificate. The kids would be called by their middle name.

Honouring heritage was important as our kids would be half Celtic and half French and all Canadian. The deal was that the girls, because they may or may not surrender their surname upon marriage, would be given French names and the boys would be given Celtic names.

No ette since their last name ends in ette it is crazy to give the girls a rhyming ette name, right? So no ette's here!

Adult names were also important. For example, a very popular French Canadien name for girls is Josee, (pronounced joe - zay). I can't imagine calling a 40+ or 50+ woman a name that is suited to a little girl.

No baggage was the only request by Louis, and I agreed. None of our kids would be named after anyone. They were complete individuals and would make of themselves, and their name, whatever they wanted with no expectation - real or imagined. The story of the most extreme baggage I've ever heard of was a few years back when a young boy was brought into our baseball facility. This kid was five and needed baseball instruction as he had a lot to live up to: his name was Nolan Ryan. Seriously.

Taking into consideration all of that it's a miracle my kids ever got names, let alone a first and a middle! What did we manage to settle on?

Nicole Claire

Aidan Cole

Olivia Chloé

James Caden

(Oh yeah, the other criteria - no decenders: f, g, j, p, q or y. I'm weird. I know.)

Why the similarity in Claire and Cole's names? Well, at 12 weeks, when I went in for my initial ultrasound, I was told that I was expecting a boy. I had no idea that, in Calgary in 1995, it was policy to tell every expectant mother that she was expecting a boy. The technician assured me I had a one in twenty chance of having a girl. As I had no previous experience, I believed we were having a boy. To make things fair, we decided Louis would choose the Celtic names and I would pick the French names. He chose "Cole". (I know, not technically Celt, but he could not be dissuaded!) During the long process of having our first child it occurred to me during one particularly painful contraction that one of two things could happen: I could die and the baby could be a girl. I made Louis swear that if either of those things happened - or god forbid both at once - the baby would be named Claire. I lived and my reward was the arrival of the most ethereal, translucent, blonde child who we named Claire. Not knowing we would have more, or if we'd ever actually have a boy, we decided to give her a "cole" name in the form of Nicole. Who knew that 13 months later our dark baby boy would arrive? He was and continues to be well suited to his name.

Olivia is not a French name. We know. But Louis had an Italian grandmother so we figured it was okay to have a bit of a "cheat" on the name. Claire has always been my most favourite of girl names, but Olivia comes a very close second. We overcompensated by giving Chloé an unmistakable French name - accent and all!

Why do they all start with "C"? That really was by chance. As a name, Claire was a given and so was Cole. When it came time to name Chloé our choices were somewhat limited as my criteria continued to be rigid. The bonus was I liked the idea that they all started with the same initial as my maiden name (which I had changed for the first 10 years of my marriage - while I was birthing babies, and have since taken back). For Chloé it was narrowed down to Chloé, Carmen or Catherine. As for Caden we had a bit of a crisis. It seemed that every boy in our town, if not a Matthew or a Ryan or an Andrew was a Connor, Cameron, Colin, Christopher, and I didn't want him to be just one of many. We were going to name him Liam. I looked everywhere and one day, while on the internet, I found Caden. Perfect!

Your boys names rhyme. Well, not the ones we use, that would be crazy. But we're at least consistent with the sounds we like! Though I will admit, having four kids with names starting with a "C" can be quite comical at times.

* * * * *

Upon Reflection:

Now that we're well into a decade of name usage, I have to admit we did a pretty good job in our selection. Every once in a while I wish we had had a crystal ball or I could go back in time armed with knowledge and give Claire a different first name. Maybe Isabella? For each of our kids, most of the criteria was met. None of the kids are teased about their names, they aren't the only kids called by their middle names and other than Claire - who gets Bear - there isn't much you can "do" with Cole, Chloé and Caden. Though Caden did try. What a turkey.

Growing up I had a plan. I was going to have four boys and they were going to be named Adam, Thomas, Zachary and George. This went by way of many great plans .... Though, recently Caden has mentioned he'd have liked to have been called George and announced that his son will be named George - for me. What a sweet kid. I'm sure his wife will have something to say about it, but that's a long time off.

What about you? Are there stories behind the names you chose? Would you go back and re-name your kids? Do you love your own name or not? If you could have any other name in the world, what would it be?

Family Reboot

Maybe it is the idea that long and warm days will arrive soon. Maybe it is the pent up energy of too many days spent cooped up inside during an overly-long winter. Maybe it was reading this article over at Zen Habits, but our family definitely needs a reboot.

We are in a lull for the next little while as the summer activities get started. This is the perfect time for us to take stock of our lives, reflect and put our intentions for the future together. Certainly nothing is broken, but I've always thought it is important to know where we are and make adjustments along the way.

We'll be shaking off the old winter habits: volleyball, hockey, choir, more hockey in favour of the new spring and summer activities including softball, rugby, kayaking, and still more hockey. I think all of us are suffering from more than a bit of cabin/rink fever and need some fresh air and sunshine! I have no doubt that the simple change in weather and temperature will fix many things, but we really need to be mindful of our surroundings and those we allow into our lives and not just let the seasons come and go with no notice.

The first part of the family reboot is my own self-care which includes two really big events. First up is a  trip to Arizona with my sister, just the two of us, for ten days of sun and desert air. The agenda is completely out of my comfort zone, but my sister is an expert at these things so I know I'll be in capable hands. The second part of my personal reboot is a trip to Cape Cod with a few of my favourite friends to enjoy some time at the seashore relaxing, photo taking, reading, laughing and I'm sure there will be some wine consumption involved.

It has been a long time since I have taken the time to take care of myself. I'll be a better me and a better mum for it!

Other things that will be happening around here include:

STRUCTURED EXPECTATIONS

Learning from the lessons of last year, a bit more structure through the lazy months ahead is needed around here. I found this wonderful site that is easy to use and will keep us all on track now that the kids are so computer savvy! From brushing teeth to loading the dishwasher to mowing the lawn it can be all tracked and rewarded. I love how this system works on-line and I am anxious to see it work in practice.

BE PRESENT

I have a bad habit of doing things while the kids are talking to me. Loading the dishwasher, cleaning the counters, folding laundry, writing articles. I have to learn to just stop and give them my full and undivided attention on a regular basis. They all deserve at least that!

CONTINUE TO ASK

My kids are ever-evolving beings with many ideas and many questions; they are filled with all kinds of wonder and joy. They make my days worthwhile. I have to keep up with their ever-changing likes and dislikes, groups of friends, musical interests, all of it. I need to make sure our communication always stays wide open - that I continue to ask questions and they continue to answer. No grunts allowed!

ONE-ON-ONE TIME

With four kids busy with activities it is easy for each of them to feel lost in the crowd from time to time. Each week I'm hoping to spend one on one time with each of them, kind of a Mum-and-Me date night. They can plan where they want to go: dinner, museum, shopping, even those things I really don't like doing, but they love.

SIB SUPPORT

As much as it's important that they each feel valued individually, I want to nurture their relationships with each other. Usually they've had the option to attend activities and support their siblings, but for the next while there will be no option. Each will attend the other games and activities. They'll support their siblings and the siblings team. If there is a scheduling conflict - and there will be, at least one sibling will be there to support the one on the field.

Siblings have a special ability to needle each other. They can hurt each other like no one else can. I hate it, but it happens. I address negative and mean behaviour immediately but I know it happens, especially when I'm not around. It is part of the process of growing up. They can and do learn great skills: negotiation, patience, tolerance, conflict resolution, respect and compassion. I tread lightly when I interfere, but I do interfere.

I try to ensure they keep in mind our family mission:

The only thing I ever wanted to be was a mum. A good mum. Like anything in life, to be good at it takes a lot of hard work and joy. My kids make sure I experience both ... daily!

So worth it.

Cue eye-roll ... mine

otherwise known as why do I even try to get a photo of my kids - together?

A few weekends ago, in between the divide and conquer that is our life, we had all four of our kids in one place at one time! This does not happen often and I wanted to capture it. Even though we were indoors with no natural light and really putrid colours, it was worth an effort, right?

Do you think my kids cooperated?

And with that, our minute and a half window of photo opportunity is done.

Sigh.

At least I got a "keeper" sort of, and a series of photos that really lets you know the personalities of each of my kids: Claire is happy to, with accompanying eye roll, humour her mother and pose nicely; Cole is all about the party and the pick on his brother; Chloe is torn between behaving and enjoying a good laugh; Caden fulfills his role as little stinker brother very well.

The keeper, with adjustments:

Even better:

I'm thankful that I have four children who will humour their mother and pose for a photo, as difficult as it is, in a dull and busy hockey rink when there is so much going on to distract them. They delight in tormenting each other, but usually with good humour and a sense of fun. They are really lovely little people. I'm thankful to be their mama.

. . . . .

I'm also thankful for Ali Edwards and her ideas. On her blog, she has an "occasional series" of Thankful Thoughts. Not only that, but each time she posts a Thankful Thought it will include a free numbered overlay download. BONUS: Included in her first post is a rounded-corner photo mask.

. . . . .

Life is good. Especially if you have a sense of humour and photo editing software!

Project: Simplify

As I posted on Friday, today is the start of Project: Simplify over at simplemom.net and I'm ready to get started. I read through the grapevine that Environment Canada has announced that we are to expect three more months, yes MONTHS of winter, so I have to simulate spring in some way, so cleaning and simplifying is my method of choice!

If you're on board, and checked out the simplemom.net post on Friday, you'll know that the pre-assignment was to come up with a family statement of purpose.

(click to enlarge)

You can see we borrowed bits from Tsh, but for the most part it is all us. It's all done and ready to take over to Fortino's later today and have an 8"x10" print made. I'll put it in the family room, or kitchen, as a regular reminder. If you're wondering about the missing "god" bits? The simple explanation is that I have four kids in various stages of belief and disbelief, I want to make this concept of a family statement of purpose accessible and not create any unnecessary conflict - for now.

What about you? Do you have a statement of purpose for your family? Have you considered one? Up until this point we've had a certain commonality of understanding, but nothing was concrete and written down. I don't know that this could have been done much before now but am I ever glad it's done!

Now it's time to work on the assignment. I'll post the before and after shots of my hot spot later in the week. Good luck working on yours!

2011 | Family DO | 01 happiness

By most accounts, Abraham Lincoln is considered to have been a pretty smart guy. I've read a number of times - especially lately - his comment on happiness: "we are as happy as we choose to be".

I believe that. I've always believed that.

Now that does not discount tragic circumstances, things that are completely out of our control, but I believe we are, all of us, in full control of our reactions. Certainly the adults are expected to be. In our day-to-day existence it should be pretty routine to walk around in a good mood. If you can't do that then you can change it.

I know you can because I have.

I was raised by a miserable woman who, I am convinced now, was medically unstable. There was no bright side in her life, she was always looking for the lowest common denominator, and if she couldn't find it, she'd make it up. I thought she was unique. She is not. I am happy I survived that foundation and over the course of my years I've learned that there is always a bright side. You just have to choose to see it.

Better yet, choose to live it.

In my house we have two phrases my children will tell you they hear over and over again:

1. Do to others as you would have them do to you.

and

2. Do not inflict your bad mood on rest of us.
(Followed by "go to your room and come out when you can be a civilized human being" - said in varying degrees of volume. We're dealing with happy, not perfect.)

I'm sure there are a number of other phrases they hear and maybe I should pay closer attention! Another post for another time. At any rate, my children are children and I'm trying to ease them into understanding a happy and bright outlook. It's hard. They're kids. They struggle. Everything is either wonderful, or miserable. Black and white. Throw some hormones into the mix and whoa, look out! That's why there are only three rules in our house, the two above and the 24-hour rule: give me 24-hours notice for activities or the automatic answer is "no". Too many rules just confuses things and I'm not interested in living a litigious existence.

My job is to raise all four of them to be reasonably well-adjusted, contributing, confident and hard working adults. A tribute to their upbringing and to their own children.

Is happiness a moral obligation? I don't know that I would go that far, but I received via an e-mail from a friend, this talk:

What do you think? Are we entitled to happiness? Do your emotions dictate your actions or is it the other way around? Is this a philosophy to which you aspire or teach in your home?

Last conversation ...

I have to say it is with great relief my boy is home from his 4-Day school trip. It was a strange sensation writing up three of these conversations and having a blank page for Cole. Well, maybe not so blank because I was able to fill in a few things: I know his favourite colour is red, it has been since he was very little; I know his favourite season is fall and that he can eat Granny Smith Apples all day long ...

I had no idea he still disliked McDonald's french fries or hasn't had time to read a book, for fun, since summer. 

I'm thrilled to bits that the coolest person both Cole and Chloe know is their little brother, Caden. This has been a wonderful process - very enlightening. Even though waiting a couple of extra days to add Cole's responses to the collection was a bit painful for someone as impatient as I tend to be ... hmm.

I've learned a lot about my kids, their changing interests and enjoyed every minute of their interaction with each other while they answered the questions at the kitchen table. The good-natured bantering back and forth is exactly what I had hoped for when I decided to have a crazy number of children in a ridiculously short time-frame ;) They still drive me a bit crazy, but they are all turning into such wonderful, complex and enjoyable people.

It took me less than a minute to download the template from Designer Digitals. It took about 10 minutes per interview. It took about 10 minutes per template to add colour and background. In total 81 minutes invested in getting to know my kids - something completely priceless. Cheap at twice the price!

What are you waiting for? This is what it's all about! Right?

Twelve Days of Christmas

Did you know that the 12 days of Christmas START on Christmas Day?

I had no idea. Well I didn't until late November, when in my effort to bannish Bah and Humbug from my heart, I did some research which started over at the source of all information. I've been on a quest to find something more meaningful than the trappings of the holiday. I think I may just start with making the Twelve Days of Christmas be our focus. What do you think?

It took me a while but after reading as much as I could, I'd prefer to embrace the concept of LIGHT rather than the idea of (yet more) presents. As we all know, light takes many forms. I thought of literal lights but candles didn't make sense as beautiful as they are, so I settled on the idea of light as knowledge, understanding and hope.

Since this is our first go at this idea, I thought I'd print off these brilliant cards (pictured above) and have each of my kids, along with Louis and myself, write down our thoughts each day. Since it's hard anyone to write free-flow, I'm providing 12 prompts:

01 What was the most important thing I learned this year?
02 What was the most exciting/fun thing I did this past year?
03 What was my greatest accomplishment this year?
04 What do I like best about me?
05 What do I most want to improve about myself over the next year?
06 What was the best book I read this past year? Why?
07 What was my favourite television program to watch?
08 What meal could I eat every day?
09 If I could have only one treat, what would it be?
10 What is the best part of my personality - my gift to the world?
11 What was the hardest thing to master this year?
12 What do I most look forward to doing/seeing/learning next year?

I printed off some journaling cards and wrote on each of them Name: Looking Toward 2011 in the font that my kids like most: Claire gets Cocktail Script, Cole gets Rockwell, Chloe gets Amelie and Caden gets American Typewriter. I know it sounds silly, but these really are "their" fonts. Me? Honey Script. Louis gets Adler.

These will all be collected and stored to be opened on Christmas Day 2011. I think these will be very interesting to read next year, and in years to come!

In our lives there is always so much going on, I like the idea of us all taking some time out of the day to slow down and reflect on what happened over the year. It's also a great chance for me to gauge where my family is at and where they're going and understand the expectations of the year to come!

December Daily: Highlight Photos

Each morning this month I look at the date with a mix of surprise and panic. I can't slow the days down!

So much to do, so many places to be, so many things to do. I didn't help matters when I took on #reverb10, Picture the Holidays as well as my original plan to make a simple December Daily. I am enjoying all three, very much. Simple, it turns out, is not easy - especially when there is lots to do.

In an effort to better use my time, I've decided to print my photos for the December Daily at the end of the month rather than printing them here at home. It is way more time- and cost-effective. Two things that are really appealing at this time of year! (I'm using the Ali Edwards 6"x8" Overlays as the basis of my album and I also bought the Layered Template Set to supplement.)

Here are my first week worth of highlight photos (5.5"x6.25") to be added to the daily overlays I already printed onto cardstock.

December 1

December 2

December 3

December 4

December 5

December 6

December 7

Fonts: Arial & Agnes

I'm keeping pretty detailed notes on our days - so far. Once I put together the layered templates with some supplemental photos I'll figure out how I'll use the information I'm collecting - or not. I find it's always better to err on too much. After all, there are plenty of stories that can be made into layouts and honoured in other ways outside of this December Daily project.

We definitely hit the month at a break-neck pace but I expect things to slow down, if only a little, through this next week of exams and hopefully we'll manage some baking, shopping and maybe finish decorating!

What about you? How are you recording your December?

Untrapping Christmas

For a multitude of reasons, I have never been much of a fan of Christmas - emotionally residing somewhere between bah and humbug. It's the trappings of the holiday that get to me, not the actual celebration. I have a hard time rationalizing the baby in the manger and his gifts to the world and the rampant commercialism which is celebrated in his name. Fortunately for me, I never had to acknowledge the holiday during my extended single years, but when I had children, I really made an effort to embrace the holiday.

Every year the season gets more overdone:

• "Christmas in July" all over the www, seriously? I have a hard enough time with it starting on November 1st - or earlier!
• The neighbour with the monstrously large blow up snow globe on the front lawn, really? (And, are you going to leave it up through March, again, this year?)
• Mall lights up and LIT on all of the trees in mid-October over at Dorval Landing and the whole of Chelster Hall decorated in early-October!
• Christmas and Hallowe'en being merchandised at the same time? Has retail really become that desperate?

I just don't get it.

For the longest time I did my best to embrace all of it. Decorating the house, inside and out. Big gifts, small gifts, plenty of gifts, overflowing stockings and a maze to reach the fully decorated-to-the-ceiling tree. Gingerbread houses, arts and crafts, paper snowflakes, school concerts, plays and parties. Food, tons and tons of traditional foods: a marriage of French Canadien and Scottish influences to reflect our family and the stereo playing the Trans-Siberian Orchestra in an endless loop. I recognized that even with the best of intentions, we always, ALWAYS over did it.

Mama was overcompensating.

Things changed last year. Since I can only affect what happens in our home we dialed it back. Way back. Gifts were limited to three (after all, the baby in the manger was happy with three, why wouldn't my kids be happy?).  We did not decorate the outside with a multitude of twinkly lights, I barely remembered to put a wreath on the front door! Instead, we enjoyed the best of the season: we visited with friends, watched hockey games, enjoyed family gatherings and choir performances. With four kids at two schools and many sport teams all jockeying to have parties and presentations it can be pretty chaotic.

WARNING: Cover eyes of small children who can read

This year things will change even more. Our "Days of Ho Ho" are close to being over. Caden will be let in on the whole secret and I'm not looking forward to that scene! Now I have reconcile my feelings that my youngest believer has been lied to his whole life. Like I've said before: my kids are like the four points on a compass. The first three had different reactions and I know this one will be the worst. I won't be able to argue with him. He's right. I don't know if I'll be able to handle the wet gray eyes!

But I digress.

Warning over.

My formula to becoming untrapped? AKA, my back to the meaning of Christmas basics include:

• The season did not start at Hallowe'en and will not last through January. The season will start in early to mid-December with the putting up of the tree and will last through Ephiphany (January 6th) though my preference would be Boxing Day (December 26th)
• Well, except that the music starts today. Why? Because it's one of my favourite aspects of the season, and since the Santa Claus parade was held on the weekend, I suppose it heralds the official, or at least acceptable, start :)
• One of my most favourite not-to-be-abandoned traditions: when the kids were little, we went to Toys R Us and each child chose a favourite toy. We bought it and then promptly gave it to the Toy Drive. Sometimes my kids got it for Christmas, sometimes they changed their minds. But they always knew, by experience, it was good to give back - and sometimes do without.
• Incorporated into all of this will be the studying for and writing of exams. Good thing hot chocolate and sugar cookies are the perfect stress reliever!
• Each child will receive three gifts and maybe one stocking. Though, the jury is still out about the stocking. That can in itself can get a little crazy.
• Those gifts will be wrapped in Kraft or newspaper and twine.
• If the kids choose to purchase gifts for each other, that's great, but they have to have some meaningful value; and, if you buy for one sib you must buy for all.
• No gifts for mama and dad. We have enough. Write us a poem. Sing us a song. Clean the dishes.
• Volunteer opportunities abound. Louis and I are often busy at the rink or through the choir in a church or auditorium. It's time for the olders to find their own opportunities. The youngers can tag around at the rinks.
• Each of us will contribute to each celebratory meal: Christmas Eve (traditionally French Canadien), Christmas Day (traditionally Scots Canadian) and New Year's Day. (Thank goodness New Year's Eve is Asian take-out!) I want each of the kids to make a special dish and bake a special treat and understand the significance of each. I also want them to suggest foods that they would like to have included in our family traditions.

Adding to the fun of the season, we will be hosting some young hockey players from Norway from Boxing Day through the end of the month as they will be here to play in the Richard Bell Hockey Tournament. My house will be filled with boys and hockey equipment. Perfect!

Our holiday will be meaningful, mindful and authentic. With that we won't be giving up the best part of the holidays: people and food, and music and laughter. The trappings? I won't feel trapped by them any more. I'm looking forward to the changes my kids bring. It's now their turn to see what they want to make of the holiday and include the parents rather than the other way around. We're all exited about it!

Official Welcome

In August we welcomed the newest member of our clan: Baby Ava who joined my step sister and her husband after a (thankfully) drama-free nine months. Over the weekend the girls - I'm the eldest of five daughters - got together with aunts and daughters and a few close friends and family to officially welcome Ava to the family.

My daughters and I chose one gift each: Claire's most favourite book; Chloe found the sweetest bear and I made the butterfly art.

Little Ava will be well dressed for all of the gorgeous outfits she received!

I was unprepared for my reaction to this sight! Ava, ever alert, never fussed when she was with Claire, the baby whisperer.

It was a lovely afternoon of finger sandwiches, bite sized cupcakes and champagne.

Picture: the one in my head

I take hundreds if not thousands of photographs a month. I have many challenges in which I participate. More than a few assignments. Many reasons to document, pictorially, the events of my kids lives.

I find amid the chaos and crazy of our life that my most vivid memories are the snippets I have no actual photos of ... they are locked in my head. I am sure I'm like many mums, on the camera side of the photo. Unlike the photos, most of my memories have me as a central part of the activities.

I was recently talking to a lovely man who has been integral to my time here in Oakville. He is such a kind hearted and lovely person. He loves me and my kids. No, not my husband, but Cole and Caden's "supplemental hockey coach". The man to whom I took my boys - and even Chloe for a time - to learn how to skate, to learn how to shoot, all the basics of hockey. All the basics of being team members. He was an example of great patience accompanied by great life lessons.

It must be this time of year, but the picture in my head, the one I cannot shake, is that of me with Claire holding a diaper bag and Cole holding his hockey stick walking ahead through the parking lot and me with a double-stroller and hockey bag slung over my shoulder trying to maneuver our way out of the overstuffed van, into the massive 4-plex rink and down to the changeroom - almost always #8, the last one.

(Have I mentioned I had 4 kids in 5 years, and Louis was out of town 5-to-7-days a week for months at a time, er, 7 years?)

Now I look back and shake my head. I find it funny and endearing that others shake their head too. I love that others who were so incredibly kind at the time, are still with me, with great humour, laughing with me about how crazy my life was way back then.

I wish I had a photo.

I'd give anything to have just one.

Proof of crazy! Proof of survival. Proof of great people.

Wellness Wednesday: What's good for kids ...

is good for adults.

Right? I was reminded of this post over at Simple Mom while reading this post over at the Daily Digi. I was inspired to write about the original post last October until I forgot ... you know, kids and life! At that time in my blogging evolution, I was also less confident offering my parenting opinions. Now, I have come to realize that my opinion is just an opinion. It can differ from yours but it doesn't make yours any less valid. So, I'm no longer fearful of offering my two cents when it comes to children and raising them.

Over the years, as a parent, I've been a pretty good model in a behaviour and cerebral sense, but not so much a good model in a physical sense. We have one rule: do unto others; after that things are pretty simple. I do my best, but don't always manage, to teach by doing:

1. Do your chores.

Do you do your chores? Though my house is rarely spotless, and almost always looks "lived in" the kids do often see me folding laundry, doing dishes, cleaning out the fridge, washing floors and windows, even (if reluctantly) cooking. Now we're handing off a number of chores to the children, more for them to know how to do the activity than to get them done. Case in point:

I'd like for us to be better examples, and surround myself by fewer half-done projects (sometimes I feel like I live in a junk yard of unending projects) but I can only do what I can do. 

2. Eat your vegetables.

I think this portion is nailed since I've now banned, yes banned, the purchase of ice cream for household consumption. That and potato chips. And cookies. They are all now "special occasion" purchases, usually requiring that we leave the house. We now go to the ice cream store for a treat. The condition is that we all, every member of the family, must be in attendance. That drastically cuts down the visits and calories!

We are perimeter shoppers. Most of the product put in our shopping cart is found on the outside walls of the grocery store: produce, meat, dairy. Other than paper products, coffee & tea, spices & oils, pasta & brown rice, cereal and Perrier, everything else is fresh. I don't need more cupboard space, I need another fridge! Correction, we also eat peanut butter now that my kids have discovered it tastes good and it's not as "evil" as they have been lead to believe (at school) their whole lives. Hard to get kids to eat something that has been banned from schools and can kill their friends.

It can be an expensive choice since in Canada most fresh fruit and veg is imported all winter long, and winter is a very long season. In the end, I justify purchases by this simple belief: the expense of good food is far better spent than the expense of health care later.

Do you snack between meals? Of course, but it is usually baba ghanouj or tzatziki on whole wheat pita or green apples with peanut butter. I buy at least 2 dozen green apples a week, and that's for Cole alone!

3. Be kind.

I am blessed with four really great kids who get along, most of the time. When the don't they are sent to their respective corners and come out when things calm down. I can honestly say I've never had to deal with the occasional hair pulling, pushing, or punching, but I have dealt with refusal to share and plenty of yelling. 

I do not subscribe to the theory "kids will be kids", kids will be whatever you let them be. Yes, I'm all about dynamic parenting.

Louis and I do a lot of talking in front of the kids but we have rarely, if ever, discussed anyone in a negative manner unless it was an issue of the kids safety and well being. It is my fundamental belief that every parent does the best they can, but sometimes that's not enough. I am amazed at the number of my kid's friends who are included in conversations with their parents on a peer level. Those are the tough questions for me to answer when our kids have too much information about a person or situation which is not age appropriate or controversial, something inappropriate shared with them by their friends. I will say here, but not to my kids, that I resent those parents who treat their kids as friends or confessionals. They are hurting everyone, mostly their kids, but mine as well.

We do our best to be either candid and honest, or we shut them down immediately and tell them that the topic is none of their business, and indeed, not any of ours either.

4. Run and play.

This is where, as an example, I fail my kids. By example they see me: cooking, cleaning, chauffeuring, taking photos or typing. Rarely, if ever, do they see me exercising, walking, swimming or playing tennis (sigh, I miss tennis) or any other physical challenge.

I have to give them credit. They are very active. At least, three out of four of them are active.

In this, I have let my kids, and myself down. This has to change and I've asked my kids to be my "personal trainer". I'm curious to know which one will be like Jillian and who will be like Bob. I have my suspicions, but will wait to see.

To my credit, I've never said no to my kids when they ask me to get up and move with them. We've enjoyed many walks and frisbee games and sword fights!

5. Go outside.

I love the outdoors. I join them in Spring and Fall. Great photo ops with no humidity, no bugs and no snow :) My excuse for not being out lately? I'm allergic to everything out there!

We do "field trips" which are actual trips in the field or forest. I encourage them to kayak on the lake, go to the park and skate park, walk to Bronte to the harbour. On those occasions, I bring along the camera and they indulge me. Probably a couple of times a week, not enough, but better than staying inside all day.

6. Money doesn’t grow on trees.

I loathe shopping. The idea of going to the mall invokes a visceral reaction - it's not good. I will go, but I have to have a list. I stick with the list and only buy items if I feel they have value. Often, when buying clothes, I wonder how many times an article can be worn to amortize the initial cost. I head straight for the back racks and rarely, if ever, buy anything that is not on sale. 

This does not mean I don't spend money. I just spend it as wisely as I can. My kids hear a lot of "no" and I'm seeing signs that it's working.

As for money management, the actual bill paying? It's all done on-line and as I've mentioned before, I'm not interested in over-sharing with my children. My kids learn practical budgeting. They budget their own money. For example: Claire and Cole both have "X" amount deposited in their accounts on their birthday. That is their money for the year. They use it to buy things that are not my responsibility as parent to purchase, so that would be entertainment (books, movies), clothes (non-uniform) and activities. If they run through their money they can earn more, but I'll not give them anything for nothing.

7. Go to bed.

I am fortunate, now, that I have grown up time whenever I want it. Gone are the days when I was home all day with four kids all born in five years and me desperate for bedtime when there would be a bit of silence and maybe adult interaction. I have great respect for sleep.

In summer, our days are more laid-back and we eat dinner around 6PM, finish cleaning-up by 7PM and we all relax and enjoy our evenings until about 9PM and then it's off to bed soon thereafter. Me included. I get up around 6AM if not earlier, the only kid up before noon is Caden!

Our winter schedule is far more frantic and scattered. During school the importance of sleep is emphasized regularly with my children, and I am all about a good night's sleep. Early to bed, early to rise. My days of attempting Superwoman are long gone!

* * * * *

What about you? Do you employ these strategies in your home? Do you struggle with some? What comes easiest to you? Share!

If I'm a Good Mother

I was inspired by this post and thought I'd give it a try.

If I'm a good mother it is only because of ...

Chicken Fingers
Equipment trees
Established routines
Perrier
Cyber & IRL friends
Laundry love
Sauvignon Blanc
Singing in the car
Lists
Flip Flops
Canon 40D
Grilled salmon
Clean bathrooms
Lemon anything
Family support
Jamie Oliver
Crafty projects
Eucerin Cream
Oodles of activities
Books
Cool basement
Mechanical Pencils
Blackberry
Pub Night
Popcorn
Reactine
Hugs
Bubbles & Sidewalk Chalk
Lake views
Daily walks
Always having something to do

At the end of it all, if I'm a good mother it is only because I have four spectacular kids.

*8 Things: Triggers

While visiting the Happiest Mom she had an interesting article that got me thinking.  Then she asked at the end "What are your Cranky Mom triggers? Have you learned to identify and avoid some of them?"

I have to admit, by the end of May, maybe due to the full moon, but my triggers were going off all over the place. I suppose with six people under the same roof, the odds are great that some days will be more stressful than others.

My triggers:

1. Late. Don't be late. Don't make me late.
2. Dishes left in the sink. The dishwasher is RIGHT THERE. Oh, and if the dishwasher is full of clean dishes EMPTY IT.
3. Calls/e-mails from school to bring something forgotten. The last question mama asks when you leave the house is: do you have everything? keys? homework? lunch? If you say yes then why am I going to school mid-day?
4. Towels on the floor, bikes left in the rain, equipment in three different places. Put your stuff AWAY! Grr.
5. Ignoring the 24 hour rule. This is a long-standing rule that I need 24 hours notice of a kid activity. Do not ask me, especially in front of your little friend, if you can do XYZ in 15 minutes. And, definitely do not have a SNIT FIT when I say "no".
6. Instant answers are not available. Do not be in possession of critical information an then expect me to give an instant answer when it is finally shared with me. I think everyone is realizing that I'm not into surprises or spontaneous anything!
7. My stuff. Do not "borrow" my stuff because in reality you steal it as I never see it again: make up, notebooks, tweezers, books, camera, flash cards (!!), brushes, scrapbook supplies, all manner of things I need throughout the day. Take the pots, pans, and cooking sheets instead!
8. Laundry is done by me, not the laundry fairy. Even though I enjoy doing it, please do not send clean clothes to the laundry room. I know that you haven't worn it and you were just too lazy to put it away properly. (I do laundry, I do not do put-away.) By the same token, if it is on your floor, it cannot be in the wash. Hnm?

The second question was whether or not I have learned to identify them (clearly, yes) and avoid them (clearly, no).

Why can't I avoid them? I'm not sure if my kids enjoy me losing my temper or if they're stupid and lazy - which I know they are not. Sometimes. Maybe. I'll chalk it up to young.

The real question is how do I cope? Well, my usual answer would be WINE. But, as part of the Boost Energy portion of my Happiness Project, in order to sleep better I've cut out the wine consumption. 100%. So, now I cope the old fashioned way, I count to 10 and if that doesn't work, I send them to clean their rooms :) ETA: the counting didn't work, I'm back to drinking wine and seriously considering putting in some ear buds and wearing a blindfold to get through my days!

Hmm. Maybe we've discovered the real trigger for my being cranky?

What about you. What sets you off? Are you able to avoid it?

Birds and family ...

Who knew when my sister Andrea moved to town with her family, part of her entourage included birds. THREE of them!

Claire and Cole are totally enamoured with them.

Well one of them. The yellow one.

Now they're killing me with constant requests for birds. OMG. Save me. No pets!

I might lend Claire and Cole out to bird-sit. But no way are we going to have a bird, or hamster, or turtle, or guinea pig, or dog, or goldfish, or gecko. Funny, no request for a cat.

No to all of it!

BUT a big YES to having my sister and her family here in town. I'm so thrilled to have family close by. In 15 years of marriage, Louis and I have never been in the same town as any family member and it is such a thrill. When they moved back from Chicago they could have chosen any community in the GTA and I'm so happy they chose to be in the burbs with us! I can watch over her house when they head on holiday, she can have an emergency contact invested in her family, I can give them the name of the best Chinese take-out in town (I did that first thing!), she can support Cole's fundraisers, I can babysit and give them a night out. Who am I kidding. Claire or Cole can :)

The comfort and trust that is part of being part of a family makes her being here a joy and a relief, a comfort I didn't realize I was missing until she arrived.

Super Sunday!

A hint of my parents magical back yard ... lots of ivy, purple hydrangea and stone.

Today was a wonderful day. 

It started very early. Louis and Cole were out the door and headed off to Westwood Arenas for 8AM. Cole and his BTNL Spring Hockey Team were in the Semi-Finals of the Bauer Pro Hockey Spring Shoot Out. They were up against the East Coast Selects. This team is made up of a number of Marlie players - those who were not on the LGB team beaten on Saturday. The chances of BTNL winning were considered slim.

While they were at the rink, I was at home getting the rest of the family ready to head over to my parent's place for our slightly delayed Mother's Day celebration. The delay was due to my step-sister Andrea moving back to Canada with her family, from Chicago. They've been gone far too long!

On the way out the door we found out that against the odds Cole and his BTNL team came back from a 2-0 deficit to beat the East Coast Selects team by a score of 5-2. Not only did they show great character, they made it to the championship game!

After an insane drive into Toronto (the Gardner Expressway closed AND there was a run of some kind closing down Lakeshore! Crazy. It took over an hour and a half to make a 45 minute trip!) I was so happy/relieved to make it to the house! Beth's family is there, Dad's family is there. It is such a delightful day. I'm so happy my parents have created this tradition. All the sisters and cousins, husbands and family all in one space. My step-sister Natalie is expecting her first child in late-July and it will be a nice addition having a little person around. The current youngest is in first grade! My sisters, Bryn and Beth and their families are so fun to catch up with, and it's so nice to hear what's going on in their lives. We all keep in touch, but it's in broad strokes (and blogs!). An endless game of telephone - so nice to catch up: see, hear and feel in person!

As you can well imagine, I spent most of the party waiting for hockey game updates. They were sparse. Well, really, they were non-existent. Thank goodness this (anxious) apple did not fall far and at my father's insistence I texted finally found out that Cole's team had WON the tournament, after another 2-0 deficit, and they were on their way to the house to celebrate with everyone.

Lots of laughter, stories, congratulations, hugs, food and wine shared among us all.

Once home Chloe and I had a little debriefing in the kitchen. She informed me that this is one of the best days of the year. One they all, every one of the cousins, look forward to all. year. long. I'm sure Beth (my step-mum) will be thrilled to know that, so I'm going to have my kids write a letter to that effect - to let her know how much her efforts are appreciated. Chloe, of course, with author the thank you note :)

I had such a wonderful Sunday. I hope you did too!

Sketchapalooza 6 starts TODAY!!

The first sketch over at Sketchapalooza 6 will be revealed today :) I am thrilled to have been chosen to be on the Design Team this time around. I know that Jayne, Becky, Tracy and I have some really fun and creative ideas in store. If you haven't joined in, what are you waiting for? It promises to be a great group of ladies, if the pre-class chatter is anything to go by. And, if you're in LOAD with me, it will give 20 days of sketches to follow. So great to have, especially on those days you hit a creative block :)

This is the third day of LOAD and I'm thrilled to say I haven't dropped out yet! Whoot! Mind you, the day isn't over and I haven't created a layout yet today! But I can share the layout from yesterday:

CARDSTOCK: Bazzill
PRINTED PAPER: My Minds Eye
CHIPBOARD: Stash
THICKERS: American Crafts
FONT: American Typewriter
SCRAPLIFT: Jody Dent-Pruks
CHALLENGE: Write.Click.Scrapbook

This time around the focus of LOAD is to determine your own personal style. Mine is pretty well established, I think! I'm going to use this month to do a few things: use up the supplies I have on hand, pack up and give away any supplies I won't use, join in challenges to get layouts done. And, post those layouts on the challenge sites :)

My layout for Sketchapalooza 6, Sketch 1:

CARDSTOCK: Bazzill Dots
PRINTED PAPER: Stash
CHIPBOARD: Stash
INK: Color Box Liquid Chalk
FONT: Adler
SKETCH: Becky Rico
CHALLENGE: Feeling Scrappy Sketchapalooza 6

Have a wonderful Monday, and a great week! If you're on LOAD or over at Feeling Scrappy, be sure to say hi :)

Wellness Wednesday: Work

I have to tell you, early retirement is over-rated.

Over a year ago when we lost the baseball business to a combination of the economic downturn and a greedy landlord, my husband Louis has spent much time here at home, with me. He has thrown himself into various ventures and volunteer opportunities, so he's been busy, in the evenings and on weekends. But, during the day he is here.

With me.

All the time.

All day long.

The first job opportunity, one I was very nervous about, fell through. Thank goodness!

Another job opportunity, the timing was not right.

And now, embracing his entrepreneurial nature, he has decided to see what he can do in an area he loves: logistics. Warehousing and transportation is his area of expertise. So, in an effort to show my support, I made up some very simple business cards:

and he's off to explore the market.

So, if you have anything that needs to go from Point A to Point B and warehoused somewhere in between, you know the guy to call :)

Fingers crossed his entrepreneurial exploration turns into something great!

Are you ready?

Tomorrow it starts!

I'm giddy with anticipation!

What am I talking about?

I'm participating, with many others, in the Ali Edwards inspired Week In The Life project as I mentioned here last month.

The preparations are as complete as they can be, and I think I'm ready to go:

DESIGN:

After much internal debate, I've decided to go with the colour combination I currently love: gray and orange. Maybe not particularly spring-like, but they really appeal to me right now. As a result, with much help from my Facebook friends (thanks Barb, Michelle and Moon) to go with the now discontinued Basic Grey Ambrosia papers. Well, the papers I could find. Here in Canada. Easily. (read: so NOT easy, or economical!). Just one more example of how I never do anything the easy way :)

The format will be very basic, following and repeating after the introductory page each day will have:

Left Side: Large Photo, Daily Journal
Insert: Trading Card Pages with 9 slots for 2.5"x3.5" Photos/Printed Paper/Journal Cards/Ephemera
Right Side: Photo Collage, Weather Report

MATERIALS:

1 - 12x12 American Crafts Album with 8 - Page Protectors
7 - 8.5x11 Trading Card Pages (borrowed from Caden, shhhh!)
8 - Basic Grey Ambrosia
8 - Bazzill Thunder Cardstock
8 - Bazzill Orange (from stash, no idea of colour) Cardstock
16 - Bazzill White Orange Peel Cardstock
Embellishments: Buttons, Brads, Ink, Butterflies
Fonts: American Typewriter, Aquarelle, Eras Medium ITC

I also made up a few journaling cards to include in the Sport Card Protectors, these are based off of the Simple Woman's Daybook:

I am thankful for
I am thinking
I am reading
I am hoping
I am eating
I am learning
I am wearing
I am hearing
I am buying
I am planning
I am watching
In the news
The price of gas
I have discovered
I am enjoying

These will be added in to each day as I think of things, some will be repeated, some may not be used at all.

EQUIPMENT:

I've got my batteries charged for both my goof-proof Canon G10 which will come with me everywhere, as always, in my bag; and for my DSLR Canon 40D which is a little more cumbersome, and more intimidating to those I'm trying to photograph!

I bought brand new ScanDisk cards for each camera. Plenty of memory to fill!

I've got my mini Moleskine gridded notebook and pencil all ready to go in order to take notes of the minutia and details that make my week uniquely mine.

PLAN:

I've developed a list of potential "photo ops" which include things like:

• the convertible - top down!
• kites flying/frisbee throwing
• exercise routine/pedometer
• the tree: daily to see the leafing progress
• signs of spring
• playing in puddles
• garden centre
• weather changes
• spring cleaning
• bags of goods for charity bins
• books we're reading
• kids with faces soaking up the sun
• trip to the creek/park/harbour

I've organized my calendar so meals are pre-prepared, or easier than usual, so that I can focus on this project.

I've pre-formatted all the scrapbook pages - in 12x12 size - in Microsoft Word (I know I have a Mac, but I couldn't give up the Microsoft software) so that they are all ready to go with no messing around with margins or colours. I'm only messing around with journaling and photos.

In addition, I've been going through my last album and tweaking some of my plans for this album. It looks like a few others have been doing the same:

Ali Edwards at Ali Edwards

Aby Garvey guest posting at Ali Edwards

Sharyn Carlson at Living Artfully

Evalyn @ Pieces of Me

Jennifer Wilson @ simple scrapper

EXECUTION:

I am hoping to have the album printed up and put together early next week. I'm learning the longer it stays on the "to do" list, the less likely it will get done. Since I do not *gasp* edit my photos the process should be very quick:

Monday/26: Choose and take photos to developer, start journaling
Tuesday/27: Finish journaling, collect developed photos
Wednesday/28: Crop and place photos, plan the "pretty"
Thursday/29: Add the "pretty" and photograph all pages
Friday/30: Post photos here on the blog and onto the Facebook group

Part of the execution process will include posting selected photos and journaling here on the blog in order to keep my memories fresh - and to share with you, of course! From here I can choose the photos to include, and the stories can be simply cut-and-pasted into the prepared template. Whoot!

GLITCH:

Because there always has to be one or two, right? Late last week I received a note telling me that my order from A Cherry On Top was cancelled because of a miscommunication with PayPal. That order had all of my embellishments, you know, all the fun stuff, for the project!! I finally managed to work it out, I thought only to realize it wasn't, and the order was not shipped. So, now things are "in process" and should be here within 2-6 weeks. Canada is "international" after all :) So much for being organized, nothing ever goes smooth when you have everything in place. 

POTENTIAL GLITCH:

The brilliant and talented Ali Edwards is designing new digital elements for this project! Drat, I've only just re-worked all of my previous project to incorporate the new colours and new fonts. Can I just ignore them? Or will I venture over to Designer Digitals to check them out when they're introduced this weekend? Will I be able to resist? Will I want to? Oh, the temptation!

ETA: I did check out the new design and I have to say, I'm happy to stay with my "old" design. And, THRILLED to see that I managed to come up with my quick and easy journaling cards without even seeing those done by the brilliant Ali Edwards! Okay, it's a small accomplishment, but I'm remarkably pleased with myself.

What do you think? Are you in? Are you ready? Even if you're not, you have all day today to get ready. You won't regret it!

I can't wait. Even my photo-phobic kids are excited!

Happy Easter!

Chloe had her little forever friend Olivia stay overnight on Friday. During the day they managed to create a dozen eggs and invited Caden to join in the fun. The olders, of course, had to play too.

Ah, family togetherness.

There was so much silliness here yesterday I ended up taking close to 200 photos. On of my favourites was Claire in the cow hat. Yes, really.

The cow hat:

Pure silliness.

I love laughter in my kitchen.

Have a wonderful Easter!

Staged Re-entry

I have to say it's not easy to get it together after a couple of weeks out of our regular routine. Not only that, but for some reason adjusting to Daylight Savings Time, even while the kids were on holiday, was difficult. I think I'm only just getting it together.

Caden started back at school yesterday. It was the very first time he's ever started anything without Chloe to help him get organized and ease him into his routine. I suppose he should get used to it since next year he'll be on his own ... every day!

Chloe and Claire returned from their grand Florida adventure with very little drama flying together from Fort Lauderdale to Toronto as "unaccompanied minors". I'm sure we still haven't heard all of stories or seen all of the photos! They had such a great time. They look great! It is so nice to have my chickies home again. They, along with Cole, start back to school today. Cole may have the most adjustment. I don't know what he'll do when he sees salad and healthy food waiting for him when he hits the dining hall at lunch! Not only that but he has a hockey game tonight - fingers crossed it is the last one of the season! - the Tri-County championship may be determined tonight.

Today, for me, is one of those "I'm so embarrassed" days as the cleaning ladies are going to put everything back in order! Well, they will after I do it first :) I think I'll hide in the basement and get all of the laundry done and desk work finished!

Have a wonderful Tuesday. I hope your re-entry has been easy!

Love found in the closet

It has always been a painful reality to me that my girls do not get along.

Sure they are polite and helpful around the house when told to perform a chore; they engage in polite conversation at the table or during family activities; they share a passing awareness of what is going on in each other's life. As a mama, I don't demand much, but I do demand respect, of everyone.

My concern is that there is no genuine curiosity or interest in the activities of the other. From first hand experience I know that these are not qualities you can force on siblings, you certainly can't tell the eldest to "do the right thing because" as it always takes two to have a relationship. As a parent, I believe, all you can do is step in when necessary and consistently foster an environment for change and acceptance. Oh, and keep your fingers crossed that maybe, just maybe, something will happen that makes them sit up and take notice that they are potentially the best friends they could ever have, ever.

I very hopefully and quietly (shhh, don't jinx it) think this day may have arrived!

It has become a family tradition that whichever grandchild turns 10 that year, and some years there will be multiple members who meet that criteria, they get to go visit Nanna and Grampy at their winter home in Florida for a few days. Claire went a few years ago when she turned 10 and Cole went with his cousin when they turned 10. This year it is Chloé's turn. Not that my parents aren't company enough, but to ensure Chloé is fully engaged and does not suffer a boring moment, Claire has been invited to tag along to keep her company and give Nanna and Grampy a bit of a break now and then - a tennis game, biking, a ride in the golf cart, endless hours in the pool and hot tub - you get the idea.

They left at 3PM today. They don't return until late next Monday. I was fearful of this day and spent many hours just hoping against hope that they'd just get along rather than sit in stony silence, which is more often than not the case. Way better than the alternative, but still not quite right.

Yesterday it happened. After speaking with Nanna about the weather, which using her words was "cold", I decided to take the girls over to the mall to pick up a few things. Primarily a trench coat for Claire (which we found, very cute, black and traditional) but more important was to find more than a few things for Chloé who seems to find fashion in her brother's closet rather than her own. Ugh. Madam Fashionista, Claire, took off with her friend to find some things and I took Chloé with me. To me shopping is a pain worse than childbirth, so this was a big deal. We went to two places: Garage and American Eagle. (I'm trying to deal with the shock I'm no longer shopping for sweetly coordinated duds at Children's Place and Gap for Kids!) Many outfits were tried on, many rejected, many purchased. We regrouped at the food court where we shared our finds.

Then reality dawned: my girls wear the same size.

They're both smart and gorgeous: blonde, blue eyed; but, that is where the similarity ends. Claire is tall, athletic, lanky at 5'9" and Chloé is short, plump and curvy at 5' flat. I have no doubt she will gain some inches and thin out over the next couple of years, but now, in this moment, they are the same.

Tentatively I said: "well, your wardrobes have just doubled." Fingers crossed, breathe held, bracing for the worst. The idea was met with big eyes, big smiles and eventually a couple of squeals. Never in my wildest imaginings did I think clothing would be the environment to foster sisterly change, but hey, you take what you can get!

The minute we got in the door at home, they spent two hours dumping out their closets, drawers and all the clean laundry they could find to mix and match all of their clothes. I enjoyed the squeals and giggles as they ran into the kitchen with their outfits. I have to say, Claire has a very good sense of style. A little traditional mixed with a little edgy and always very modest. It works!

I know the potential pitfalls and drama caused by clothing damage, loss and dirt but that's all been discussed and I think they're both so relieved and happy to have this little bit of serendipity, they want this to work.

We'll see. The combination of a new-found mutual interest and forced quarters may just be the formula. Let's hope it's a successful one!

In the meantime, this was the reaction of my boys to the house becoming almost estrogen-free:

Looks like it's going to be a pretty entertaining - and testosterone filled - six days :)

Remiss: December Lessons

I have been remiss. On the now defunct Lemons2Lemonade, the precursor of this blog, I would do a monthly roundup of our activities. It has been brought to my attention that I neglected my December lessons. With all the activities lately, I completely forgot! So, thanks for the reminder my non-bloggy, now out-of-lurkdom friends.

December was completely snow-free. It was wonderful! Though, I do have to admit, it's hard to get in the holiday spirit with none of the white stuff blowing around. I suppose I was not anxious to write this post primarily because my mood through the month was one of bah-humbug rather than mistletoe and merriment. We did manage:

• This blog started on December 6, 2009. What a challenge learning Typepad and deciding on the format for it all.
• Claire was chosen for the D2 Volleyball team and is nervously learning this new sport. I don't think she anticipated being chosen. She's now learned how to do the basics and actually excels at serving.
• Cole was chosen to play on the Middle School hockey team with a couple of his friends. Not only is he enjoying the popularity of being on the team he's learning a lot from coaches who know hockey and have no familial distractions on the team.
• My parents came out to Oakville to watch Cole and his team. We enjoyed a lovely dinner with them and friends at Jonathan's - great place!
• Louis and I managed to survive our Eastview Parent/Teacher meetings. Chloe and Caden are so different from each other a few of the teachers are suffering whiplash. They're both doing well, but in such different ways.
• Grampy was able to see Claire play volleyball at a game she played at Havergal College and Cole play hockey at a tournament at Upper Canada College. It's so nice that he is involved with the kids.
• I managed to ruin Caden's hockey jersey. A pen was left in a pocket and there was ink everywhere. Also ruined all my white bath sheets. Argh!
• Chloe spent many hours practising and performing for the Oakville Children's Choir with performances all around town. Both Nanna and Grampy came out to watch one performance and we enjoyed dinner at Cucci's following the performance.
• Caden has been dubbed the "snowman" for all of the time he spends on the ice blocking shots. It's really quite funny to watch. He is so intense and competitive. Remarkable his version of Dr. Jeckyl & Mr. Hyde!
• After yet more unnecessary drama, Cole decided to take charge of his personal training and hockey future and listen to those who have his best interest at heart. We support him completely.
• The basement bookshelves are finally in order and I can find books! The key to organization: finding what you need when you need it :)
• Exam season was excruciating for Claire and fun for Cole. They handle the pressure so differently. Claire freezes up and Cole looks at it as a competition. Their marks relected these traits: Claire mid-70s and Cole high-90s. I have to say, I'm far more like Claire!
• Time was taken to make gifts for Cole's hockey team. Too bad we weren't able to attend!
• I had a wonderful tele-conference with a brilliant life coach. Only one more assignment. Who knows? Maybe I'll figure out what I want to be when I grow up!
• We enjoyed our family Christmas Party in Toronto. It is so nice to have all of the grandchildren around and having fun with each other. It's also wonderful to see my four sisters and their husbands.
• Louis continues to dedicate 4 hours every Sunday morning and 4 hours every Wednesday evening as convenor for the Minor Atom Red and Bantam Red hockey teams. In between, countless hours are spent organizing, communicating, authorizing and interpreting for coaches, parents, players and everyone else involved. I don't know how he does it.
• Caden and his Knights team went to see the St. Mike's Majors then played a game on the ice at the Hershey Centre. Louis helped out by getting back behind the bench.
• I finished a book! Really. Not just a book, a novel.
• Cole had more tests done and he will end up having more allergy shots this spring. The good news is that I can buy the serum from the doctor but it can be administered at school.
• Claire left for a Grand Adventure: a wonderful 4-day visit to New York City with Nanna and Grampy where she was exposed to fancy restaurants, great shopping, incredible hotels, amazing shows and big limousines. Pretty nice way to celebrate turning 14!
• Caden's hockey team had a fun holiday party - held outside! What a great group of kids and parents.
• Christmas break was filled in with a lot of sleep and a lot of hockey.
• I published my intentions and goals. It's all out there for everyone to read. This gets easier the more often I do it.
• Christmas Day was pretty low key. Santa maintained the 3-gift maximum, far harder than one might think so each stocking was considered one gift. Then Louis took all of the kids to see Avatar at the local theatre. Christmas Day movies have become our family custom. They go and I get a few hours of peace!
• Cole and his Ranger team went to Alliston and won the Regional Silver Stick tournament which qualified them for the International Silver Stick played in Pelham (St. Catharines) this past weekend.
• Order has been restored and a plan made to keep us all, as a family on track and focused on what we need to get done.
• A new era has begun, Claire went out with her friends and slept over to ring in the New Year. 

We didn't have to wait too long for snow. We had a nice white start to the new year. A lot has stayed the same but all of the work and planning in December has made the start to the year more focused and fun! I will definitely return with lessons learned in January! We're little over 1/3 the way through :)

Merry & Bright

From our home to yours, we're sending along wishes for a

Christmas & Holiday season!

This is a very quiet time of year for our family with exams over, a lighter hockey schedule, choir performances performed, birthdays celebrated, cookies baked ... and eaten.

Ahh.

Time to enjoy sleeping-in, wearing slippers and comfy clothes, lazy days of no place to go.

Alas ...

I hear my children conspiring to roast marshmallows, go ice skating, watch movies, make "real" hot chocolate or mull some cider, head over to the mall, bake more cookies, there is always something in the works.

I really should have named this new blog "looking for a dull moment" :)

Enjoy your time with your family, cheers!

SOOC Saturday: Christmas Tree

Earlier in the week we put up the Christmas Tree. By "we" I mean Claire and Cole, who are out of school, assembled it (too many allergies in our house for a real tree) and brought up all the decorations. Chloe and Caden put on the decorations once they got home from school.

So, my SOOC for this Saturday is this:

 



 

A simple activity which turned into an all-day process the kids loved. They are so fun to watch together. I'm happy to have relinquished my roll as holiday-decorator and enjoy watching them discover new things, try new things and negotiate with each other where things go and why. Nothing, well almost nothing, is where I'd put it, but they're all happy and that's what counts, right?

TGIF: 18.12.09

I'm trusting Claire is having a wonderful time in NYC with her grandparents - shopping, shows and delicious eats!

I'm grateful my parents thought to share such a wonderful experience with Claire as celebration of her 14th birthday (on December 20th).

I'm inspired by the kindness and thoughtfulness of the three children who remain at home with me. They are equally thrilled for Claire and her grand "big city" adventure. No jealousy or hard feelings, they are genuinely excited for her and anxious for stories upon her return.

* * * * *

Why the twinkle lights? Back in mid-April 2009, the brilliant Brené Brown decided to start TGIF. According to her post:

"T.G.I.F is based on my theory on twinkle-lighting. I think twinkle lights are so universally loved because they are the perfect metaphor for joy. In our culture we're taught to believe that joy and happiness should be a constant. They're not. Joy is glorious precisely because it comes in moments - mostly ordinary moments. Most of us tend to miss out on those bursts of heart-light because we're so busy chasing down "the extraordinary light" or we're too afraid to enjoy them because we know they are fleeting. A joyful life is not a "flood light" of joy. That would eventually become unbearable. I believe a joyful life is made up of joyful moments gracefully strung together by trust, gratitude, and inspiration."

Wow. I had to join. I was compelled by such perfect words and purpose.

Do you want to participate in TGIF? If so, get the scoop over at Ordinary Courage. Even if you don't want to participate, do yourself a favour today and head over anyway. You won't regret it!

Wishcasting Wednesday: Give

Each Wednesday morning, I eagerly anticipate the assignment from Jamie at Jamie Ridler Studios. Over the past year or so, I've heard much about Jamie and enjoy all aspects of her website, blog and podcasts. If you're looking for a bright spot in your day, head on over to check her out.

Today: What do you wish to give?

Every day I wish to give support and build confidence in my kids. They are energetic and enthusiastic which is sometimes enough, sometimes not. I want them to know that even when they fail, if they've given 100% and try their best, I'm always there to give encouragement, love and acceptance.

I wish to give them unconditional support, 100% of the time.

12 of 12: December

What a chaotic day! All of us were here, there and everywhere, and for the most part, I must confess, I forgot my camera. But you'll get the gist of things anyway:

Nothing beats Caden for sunny disposition in the morning. Here he's trying to win an insult-fest with his dad. He didn't come close :)

Got it finished! Was it ever fabulous. I cannot believe I let it sit on my nightstand for close to a year before I started reading it. One more reason to read review, buy book and read immediately! I have a bunch more sitting and waiting. Wonder how many other gems await?

While I was reading, I managed to eat what has become my regular breakfast: smoked turkey on organic granary bread with some dijon mustard. Yum. And a clementine. Double yum.

  Time to get wrapping. Years ago, for extra money, I would spend my lunchtime and after-work hours at the mall as a gift-wrapper. I got really quick! But I have to say, I do love bags, very efficient for odd-shaped gifts - and recyclable. Perfect.

Chaos in the Appleby parking lot! I was there to collect Claire from her science exam and Chloe from her choir rehearsal. Clearly a bagillion other people had business there too. The poor security guard was at his wit's end by the time we cleared out.

My husband is a dangerous man. Well, dangerous in that he love cheese, and he shares! Today it was brie with a fig/walnut spread. Totally decadent. Even better? I warmed up some goat cheese and spread it on crackers with the spread. The tongue loved it, the hips? Not so much!

Photos were distributed at Cole's hockey practice. He insisted this year that I get him trading cards. I was sure to get one for Grampy to go on the mantle with Cole's only other trading card from Tyke, his first year playing, in 2004!

After plenty of stops and starts all wrapping was completed! Just in time.

ETA: I've received a couple of e-mails asking if this is a dining room or stairway in my home, my family home or any other home ... technically, yes, it is a home; but, not mine or that of my parents. It is an old mansion located in downtown Toronto which was converted years ago. We have been very fortunate to be able to have our Christmas dinner and photos taken every year. Love tradition!

The traffic into Toronto was moving quickly so we were able to make it early! I got this shot of the table before everyone arrived. The flowers are always so beautiful.

Each year the kids pose for the photo on the stairs. Wow, how they've grown and changed in such a short period! Eventually everyone settled down and I'm sure there's a good photo or ten with all of us mums snapping away :)

Cole was our master of ceremonies this year. Following in the footsteps of his sister Claire and his cousin Will. I believe that means Sydney will be our master of crazy next year! Cole did a good, if reluctant, job leaving Grampy to close out the evening.

But not before we got some entertainment from my daughter Claire, and sister Bryn, who entertained us with "Last Christmas ..." lyrics from Claire's phone! 

It was a quick ride home with little traffic. We were back a the house before midnight. I took a quick shot of the lovely flowers - each daughter receives a centrepiece - before I headed off to bed.

A big day:

Claire had her science exam, Chloe had her choir rehearsal, I collected them both, Cole had his hockey practice, Chloe then had her choir concert, Louis went off to run some last minute errands then off to Toronto for the family Christmas party. What a whirlwind. Loved every minute of it. 

Hope you had a great 12th of the month too! Be sure to join in the fun: 12of12 and let me know in the comments where to find your photos :)

Early Family Christmas

The Saturday before the Saturday before Christmas is one of the highlights of our year.

Each year we are so fortunate to celebrate our family Christmas before the hustle and bustle really sets in. Growing up, this holiday was always a bone of contention with my parents. For years we spent Christmas with my mother's parents with very little regard for my dad's family. I'm pretty sure that experience is what my Dad considered when we all went off and got married and had families of our own. Years ago, he and my step-mum decided our family would celebrate Christmas on another date so as not to create conflict with any other plans. After all, Christmas is just a day. One to be celebrated surrounded by love and family.

Along with my four sisters we bundle up our combination of spouses, children, step-children, parcels, presents and stories, get all dressed up and head over to the same dining room we've been enjoying delicious food, great wine, steadily-improving entertainment for the last decade or more. There is certainly something to be said for tradition!

I always try to find something to give my sisters that gave me some challenge or joy through the year. This year my original order is more than a bit late, so I've run out and picked up copies of:

which I have thoroughly enjoyed. Well, I've enjoyed so far. Am I crazy to give away great books before I've read the end? Probably. But that's just the way it is, today!

Now that all the cousins are getting older, I've put my kids in charge of choosing the gifts. I always used to get them a set of pajamas and a book - you know, the top book for their age range for the year. Thank goodness for those lists! The other day my kids came home with:

a cat, a beaver, an owl, a giraffe, a lion, a cow, a pig, and a tiger to add to the festivities! They are very cute, and hugely warm. Fingers crossed that everyone enjoys their gifts and they don't receive so much they have to pay for extra baggage for their trips home! 

We are all so looking forward to this evening. The kids have all of their snazzy outfits are pressed and ready. We just have to get through Claire's science exam, Chloe's dress rehearsal and performance, Cole and Caden's hockey practices. Then the fun begins!

Oh, and a reminder, today is 12of12. Be sure to be taking your photos! I can't wait to see what you did all day.

ETA: It's 11:30 and I've finished and THOROUGHLY enjoyed the Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. It was wonderful from beginning, middle and end. So glad I chose to give this to my family. Just wonderful.

Welcome!

Welcome from Lemons2Lemonade.

Welcome from theLINARstudio.

After much thought, and much input from you, my lovely readers and friendly bloggers, I've decided to combine both of my blogs and create just one space for me and my life: creative life and every day life. A place for me to embrace all of it, and share it with you.

Welcome to Embrace Life: the good, the bad, the creative!

This is a new space where I hope you pour yourself a cup of whatever makes you happy, sit down for a bit, and enjoy bits and pieces of my life, which will include:

• the books I'm reading
• how we celebrate our every day
• embracing my imperfection
• family and the adventure of raising four children
• food & drink
• creations from the studio
• gratitude
• home decor ideas
  
• things that inspire me
• domestic success and challenges
• music
• serendipity
• my e-course obsession
• people we know
• photography
• places we go
• sports, hopefully not just hockey
• and some writing, who knows, it might be good

Who knew a simple $15US e-course over at shimelle.com would turn into a whole new chapter in my blogging life? It was becoming cumbersome to write two different blogs on two different platforms and I really started to have difficulty deciding what things went where. My creative life is such an integral part of me, I wanted to share my stuff. Having identical posts on two blogs became ridiculous.

I appreciate all of the e-mails I've received from those who have supported this change and responded to my request for input. I was brought to tears, a couple of times, by your kind words and encouragement.

Let me assure you that my "regular" postings will continue as often as I can manage, and for as long as they continue to be interesting! Those include:

• Sunday: For Today
• Monday: My Best Shot Monday
• Wednesday: Wellness Wednesday and/or Wishcasting
• Thursday: *8 Things
• Friday: TGIF
• Saturday: SOOC Saturday
• Monthly: 12 of 12
• Monthly: Lessons

I'm hoping to participate in and share a few other ideas, challenges and opportunities: Creative Therapy, One Little Word (even now, in it's defunct state as of late-October, it is still overflowing with inspiration), Ella Publishing, Co., JessicaSprague.com, write.click.scrapbook., Creative Scrappers and who knows what else is out there to embrace? Oh yeah, on top of all that creative challenge, there is LIFE. Raising four active kids is always a challenge with many ups and downs. I'm thrilled to be in a huge community of those who, with me, experience the joys and struggles of raising teens and pre-teens with integrity and humour. 

So here we are.

The main request from your lovely e-mails was that I maintain the look and feel of Lemons2Lemonade. I believe I have visually, and the content should continue given that I'm bringing it all here! The other big issue raised was in regards to comments. I agreed; but, selfishly, I chose the Typepad format as it is the easiest way for me to respond to comments. I felt that the give-and-take relationship was missing from L2L and I like being able to "talk" to you!

No doubt over the next couple of weeks I'll be fiddling further with formats and such, and feel free to leave me comments if something is not working, or you'd like to see something you like. There are still things to be done, and a blog is never a static project (part of the fun ... and frustration).

This has been such an intense few days of design, decisions and occasional bouts of digi-despair. I never thought I'd ever get to this point of done. I have to say a huge thank you to my new cyber friend Sharyn for her insight and support, Jill for her incredible knowledge, as well as a few others with their hints and tricks, freely shared on blogs and message boards.  The other big thank you goes out to my children for without their need for clean clothes and rumbling stomachs, I'd never have left the computer screen. Well, except for attending over a half dozen hockey games, that got me up and dressed :)

Thanks for your support! I'm looking forward to a lot of fun :)

(For those of you who need your hand held, like me, you can go to your Google Reader and "add a subscription" so you don't miss a post. Or, if you don't use Google Reader, just bookmark the new blog. Don't use the "subscribe" button ... I still haven't figured out feedburner! Be sure to remember where I am, and come back, often!)