Embrace Life

#HouseRules

Inspired by a recent IKEA ad, it got me thinking about our own house rules. Things are so different now in a house of teens rather than a house of toddlers. Some of the rules have stayed the same and some of the rules have changed along the way.

I thought I had just two simple rules in my house: treat people the way you want to be treated; and, give me 24-hours notice of plans.

My kids corrected me! It turns out there are a few more:

Don't impose your bad mood on others. A good mood? Impose!

Put glassware away in the cupboard upside down.

Don't leave the house without letting someone know where you're going - and when you plan to return.

Wood spoons and white spatulas go with wood spoons and white spatulas, all other kitchen utensils go with all other kitchen utensils. There is no reason to mix them all up.

Always answer your phone if the caller is someone related to you. (Unless you're in the shower or sleeping. Then call back as soon as you can.)

Show up. Own it. Look for good. Only good.

Let me repeat: what others think of you is none of your business.

Toilet paper comes over the top and the roll must be replaced in the same manner when empty.

If you can't live your life as though your actions and words were to be printed on the front page of the newspaper, perhaps you should reconsider those actions and words.

Put the driver's seat back to position #1 and turn down the music when you return the truck.

When empty (only drops left = empty) replace the milk bag in the fridge. Do not leave the container empty on the counter. And throw the little plastic triangles in the garbage when a new bag is opened.

Secrets are toxic. No whispering.

Get yourself up in the morning. You don't like to hear yelling in the morning only half as much as I don't like yelling.

Intollerance will not be tolerated. (Yes, I understand the hypocricy.)

Make sure you have everything with you that you need for school. With rare exception will it be delivered to you. That includes homework, gym clothes and food.

Do not delete shows from the DVR if they were not recorded for your own personal enjoyment.

When out of the house or off school property, do not use data on your phone!

When going to Fortino's, check to make sure we have the basics: bread & milk etc. before you go. And then buy what's missing.

This too shall pass - the bad times and the good times.

Who you choose to be your boyfriend/girlfriend is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. Your family will tell you the truth. Listen. We love you.

The toilet seat is always to be in the down position. Unless in use, of course.

Tell mama first. I do not want to hear from someone else's mum that you did *gasp* at an event. Best to own it and let me know first so I am prepared for the well-meaning - or pot-stirring - "friend" and her "news".

From a place of pure joy and trust, you all sing in the shower. We all suffer through every note - no one can complain about the other! :D

Clothes on your floor do not get washed. And still-folded clothes returned to the laundry room do not get washed either.

Teddy was right: comparison is the thief of joy.

Bickering over provable nonsense is exhausting. If you're going to argue please determine an idea to ease world hunger, devise a plan to stop all wars, find a cure for ebola and other terrible diseases. Nonsense? Ugh.

Check the COZI, if there is nothing, the answer is probably "yes". (Even with the 24-hour rule in place!)

Homework first.

If someone - anyone is talking trash about anyone in your family, defend first and get the facts later.

If in doubt: breathe. In-two-three. Out-two-three. Then speak.

And with that, we're done! What "rules" do you have in your house? How many have changed along the way? 

Reflection | May 2014

Every year for the last decade, May is crazytime: tons of activity for everyone in the family! I'm pretty sure at the beginning of the month I took complete leave of my senses: for many reasons we're now in search of a Havanese puppy. I finished up B-School - and by that I mean barely started, but the course is over! Transcripts have been secured, SSAT test taken and results submitted and essays written - we are prepared and well-armed for new education adventures. I am so incredibly grateful for old friends who have become new friends in a new context. A new house? Well, when my dad called after seeing a listing in the Globe & Mail Claire and I went to take a look - we did not buy that one. With a friend, I headed into Toronto for a MedCan forum and ended up on the QEW for 2+ hours then unable to make it into the city due to a marathon. Sometimes the universe speaks. Claire has mastered her VW manual transmission and is buzzing around town (I have to admit I liked it when she didn't enjoy it so I got to drive it!). Allergies! The Milton Music Festival was missed due to allergies and no one had their voice :( Claire tried out, and made, the Whitecaps (select) baseball team. Cole and Caden are playing beach volleyball at Coronation Park and having a blast! My sisters and I enjoyed our Dad & Daughter lunch in Toronto - always lots to learn. After many dresses tried and rejected, shoes tried and rejected, I was ready to head to the Appleby Gala. My purpose? Have fun and get a tent for Cole's graduation in 2015. With thanks to my host, Lisa, mission accomplished. And more! Softball season started for Chloé and she's looking forward to the season ahead. I'm enjoying the #1 Morning Glory and #3 Get Up and Go juices from Tree of Life. Mother's Day was celebrated in Toronto and with the kids getting so big it was the first time the big house felt small! I gave my camera - and photography duties - to my niece for the occasion. Windows need replacing - my home is officially the money pit. Cole had Prefect interviews, he'd like to be considered for Arts, Community, Upper School and Head. Fingers crossed! Oh the RAIN! Buckets-full rendering the beach volleyball courts and ball diamonds unusable. My two courses: writing memoir and art therapy have been fabulous, I'll be sad when they end. By mid-month, the side mirror on my truck was replaced. Out with girlfriends for lunches and dinners through the month is always a pleasure. Caden can really hit the ball! After a tornado delay, Chloé went on the music trip to Cleveland and enjoyed the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and other spots. A quick but wonderful trip that included Cedar Point! Claire was off with Myles to Chatham for the long weekend. My friend Meg makes wicked Marguaritas! Back in to Toronto to see The Lion King which was a spectacle - beautiful costumes and music, too bad the leads couldn't sing - or act :( The day improved with a BBQ at my sister Beth's place with everyone. Canada's Wonderland is open and Caden went on the Leviothin FOUR times. Crazy! LOTS of time spent in Toronto this month. Goodbye townhouse, hello house! A now-busy summer lies ahead. Rehearsal crunch-time for The Little Mermaid - though rugby games are interfering with preparations. Blyth orientation at The Old Mill went well and history will come alive for Cole this summer, for sure. Now to organize the paperwork for his Russian visa! Caden and his rugby team made it into the finals at TCS - yet another trip to Port Hope :) Sadly they did not win. Sign, sign, sign. Notarize, notarize, notarize. I'm delighted to finally find a local place to notarize documents for a reasonable price and no appointment hassle! Hello Tuesday evening crazy with two baseball practices, one beach volleyball game and a softball game all happening simultaneously! We got early news that Caden is in Powell's House next year - with his big brother and a few of his good friends. I cannot wrap my brain around Caden going INTO HIGH SCHOOL in September! We had a fun, spontaneous, dinner out at the OC followed with the kids going to the movies and a sleepover. With much stubborn effort Claire has learned that her baseball schedule and part time work will simply not coexist this summer. Caden turned 14 and we have entered that awkward time of year when I have two children the same age for three weeks as we wait for Chloé to turn 15 in mid-June. We went as a family to watch Caden as King Triton in the Middle School production of The Little Mermaid and it was fabulous - we were the loudest four audience members in Willis Hall :) With a quick turn-around he was off to Ottawa on the Middle School trip. I love my Suburban, but it's a beast: by the end of the month was regular maintenace: an oil change; and irregular maintenance: new brakes. A month into the season I was able to go and watch Claire's house league team play. Relay for Life had Cole and Chloé busy at school for a full day of luminary lighting, preparing and walking - no studying or exam prep :) One of the families hosted the rugby year-end party and it was so much fun getting to know the parents and the boys better. The big de-clutter is well underway. So happy we've made an effort to keep things flowing in and out so the project is not overwhelming.

In the lives of the kids:

Claire | Claire learned that it is not easy to find a part time job that would accomodate her baseball and tournament schedule. As an alternative, she is engaging her entrepreneurial spirit and is taking care of kids - chauffeuring, supervising, organizing - for friends over the summer, and had a few bumps during her first job, but all ended well. For $20 an hour she will drive your kid wherever they need to go, keep them entertained and well supervised! She has also learned that maintaining a home away from home - and collecting everyone's share of the rent - is not glamourous or fun or easy.

Cole | Rugby was ever-present this month. Cole got a gash over his brow at a tournament in Quebec that kept opening but is now finally on the mend - because rugby is (finally) over! The last game they played was versus the indominable St. Mike's team. There was little expectation by our boys that they would win. Out in the mud they did just that. Probably the best rugby game I've ever witnessed. So good!

Chloé | This was a big month for my girl. Once she decided (and it was overwhelmingly confirmed) it was time for her to head to a different school we did everything we could to research the schools to determine the best fit; wrote endless essays; completed the SSAT in St Catharine's; completed forms and submitted paperwork - all of this done and complete in two weeks. Now the waiting begins. The beauty of the wait? She's been distracted with summatives and course study for ASCENT and the fun of the Arts trip to  Cleveland - high stress, but lots of fun.

Caden | Caden is my most laid-back lovely child who has entered the throes of adolescence with a bang. Touchy, touchy, touchy. We've all been put on notice :) He did manage to get his New Zealand project done - he embraced a minimalist approach - as well as some kind of geometric-shape-mouse. My job? Go to Michael's and Staples for supplies. I refuse to do any more than that. Within hours of his (fabulous) performance as King Triton in the Middle School Musical production of The Little Mermaid, Caden was off with his schoolmates for the annual trip to Ottawa. And, my baby is growing up. Not only did he turn 14, but he has himself a girlfriend. Oh my!

A full month was had by all.

Life in general:

Weather | I don't remember a slower entrance of spring with the exception of the year we moved to Oakville in 1997. Not one tulip or daffodil spotted until mid-to-late in the month. It has been slow to see, but the kids have been chewing Reactine since April. So . much . rain . With it has come a very slow start to ball season! By the end of the month came soaring heat and humidity, no one wanted to complain, but the house was shut tight and the air put on.

News | Even in rehab Rob Ford manages to be in the news. The kidnapping of 200+ girls in Nigeria captured international attention. Prince Charles on part-of-Canada tour with wife Camilla - visits Manitoba, Nova Scotia and PEI. The Ontario provincial election is well underway. There seem to be a general feeling of international unrest: Ukraine, China, Thailand - tense months ahead. Looks like a Conservative MP is pushing for the Turks & Caicos to become our 11th province. #yesallwomen vs #notallmen represents a huge disconnect of entitlement in our patriarchal society - and deserves serious consideration. The U.S. seriously has to reconsider it's disgraceful gun and incarceration situation and do something about it. We lost a great woman with the passing of Maya Angelou (1928-2014).

Sports | Watching hockey and cheering the HABS through the Stanley Cup playoffs. Okay, the kids have been cheering and I've been in the room. And, the Blue Jays are off to a good start - maintaining the success throughout the season will be, as always, the challenge. The French Open is my preferred mid-day television fare.

Discovery | I am not a "cleanse" person, expecially in this cold climate, BUT I have discovered some green juices to supplement my daily diet. I've been supporting a local business: Tree of Life. So good!

Looking forward, goals I want to keep at the forefront include:

Work | Traditionally my work has been 100% my kids with the occasional dabble in photography and writing. This month was exactly that and amped up to the point of craziness! Puppy, house, identities, school ... I long for the simple days when all I had to do was wonder about what to make for dinner. Much will be put on the back burner until September!

Health | With better weather came a fully charged FitBit and many steps each day. My health is forever a work in progress and always at the forefront of my thoughts and choices. It's exhausting (read: discouraging) when there are no noticeable results - at least, on the outside.

Home | In my world nothing stays static for long. Again, things are changing. Purge, purge, purge. Pack, pack, pack. Paint, paint, paint. Love it! Loathe it!

Fun | I've started #100happydays challenge. Here at Day 10, I'm 1/10th done and 100% happier than when I took up the challenge :D A pretty good ROI, I'd say!

Me | Traditionally May is the start of the season I call "exhaustion". This year the month brought so much more than I could have ever planned or expected. I am being mindful that I have to pace myself and though I have not given up: my writing class, my art therapy class, lunch/dinner/drinks with girlfriends, meditation, reformer Pilates x2 a week, I realize there may be a time something "has to give". I just know that with lots going on and tons to look forward to attending and doing, I will never lose sight of myself and what I need for me, again. I am so grateful for this journey.

* * * * *

A couple of years ago I consistently wrote up posts summing up the month that had just past. Then life got both complicated and overwhelming, so much so I was just going from day-to-day in complete survival mode. With this new year I'm getting back into the practices of my past that I have missed.

things we do | uni-task

I suppose I am a multi-tasker simply because I'm a mum. There is always something going on, or multiple somethings. If not involved, I am playing traffic cop trying to have everything run as smoothly as possible with people coming and going, activities happening and the endless meals being planned and prepared.

In my heart and soul I am a uni-tasker.

I find when I'm doing too many things at once that:

1. Nothing gets done properly

2. I am inefficient and scattered

3. It is hard to get back on track

4. I miss deadlines and become forgetful

I known people pride themselves on being brilliant multi-taskers and kudos to them.

I am not.

Recently I spent my March Break filing. It's not that I don't file at other times, I have plenty of files. I had about 6 different "systems" in the house because I've never been able to start-and-finish a project. So? I dedicated as much time as possible, probably 20-24 hours in total, to put together:

BOX 1-4. For each of the kids, I filled to-date, a 64L file box of ephemera, awards, documents spanning their years from Pre-School to Grade 12.

BOX 5. For me, I filled a 32L file box of all current household bills.

BOX 6. For me, I filled to-date, a 32L file box of ephemera collected raising the kids.

BOX 7. Is another 32L box, now home to all of the "important" papers: my health files, house purchase, tax returns, divorce and other legal documents.

BOX 8. For me, I filled a 32L file box of all creative projects. This one is not done as I need a second box - or a bigger one!

This last box will take a while to work through. The box of projects is not complete, but about as done as it can get for the moment as I need to wrap my brain around the projects I want to do and those that have served me well in the past but it's time to let go and move on to new challenges.

The break was the perfect time as I could work when inspiration struck as I wasn't taking kids to school, appointments, activities or anything. It was as uninterrupted time as I'll ever get! Even better? Staples delivers! I ordered boxes, file folders and everything else for the project and it was delivered to my front door.

I feel lighter. The emotional weight of those piles of paper really took a lot out of me. Now? No more burden. Things are filed, I can find what I need whenever I need it. Not only that but through the process:

• Cupboards were emptied and space was made for other things - or maybe left empty?
• The floor of my room is clear and I am reclaiming my space for me!
• Seven garbage bags of c.r.a.p. were eliminated from my home.

Things are far from perfect as paper, in my world, is a constant battle. I believe I've got the upper hand - for now!

Reflection | January 2014

All months are full and January is no exception. It may be even more full than most.

Most of the month was spent re-establishing good habits and introducing some new ones. I decided my new year should start mid-January, there is just too much chaos in my house before the kids are back in school. My search for an accountant continues. I used my new Daily Planner and put on paper my goals with soul. I feel like I've got a good handle on the year ahead because goodness knows the universe does not allow real control! I got Claire back to Queen's in one piece though the ice gods did conspire against us. I made an blog writing plan and put it on the calendar. All but Cole are signed up for base/softball starting this spring. The Desire Map Book Club got off to a fantastic start and I'm thrilled to learn from the participants. I started back with my life coach, Helen, as there is always more work to do. Four weeks of Project Life 2014 have been completed, I'm off to a good start! I went to my reformer Pilates classes and am so happy for the increased flexibility - Jackie is even increasing the weights. I started a reading challenge and am enjoying the challenging material. I ate breakfast (whether it be left over Chinese take-out, Greek yogurt with almonds or simple oatmeal) every morning. My amarylis bloomed - and then fell over! I cut my wine consumption in half or more as things got a bit out of hand during the holidays. I had a new crown fitted. The garage door, not clearing the roof rack of the Suburban - was fixed in a few seconds, a quick twist of a knob resulted in a $150 bill. A mindful morning was enjoyed at iGita with Lisa Forwell and friends. A meeting was held at Appleby to promote the idea of a digital portfolio for each of the students. Semi-formal prep was enjoyed (?) at Oakville Place mall getting Cole a new sport coat and tie and a few things for Chloé. Helped out a friend and drove her daughter to the semi-formal, held at school. Plans made and tickets booked for the Bahamas, Florida, Arizona and Cape Cod. Mapped out plans for summer camps and started booking a few - Caden is actually on a wait list! Watching playoff football with Caden is a joy - he is such a rabid fan. A morning was spent at the school judging the Interpretive Reading competition for the Upper One students - so good. Big mid-week drive to Kingston to visit with Claire. Thank goodness for my sister who kept me talking over the bluetooth most of the 3+ hours there and 3+ hours back! Lunch was enjoyed with Robin and our project plans are fun to discuss. Dad's who step up for men who won't are endearing. A Pampered Chef evening was spent up at Elaine's place. I introduced Jill to Yame. All signed up for Life Organizer Navigation course with Jennifer Louden. Some personal maintenance to offset the onset of midwinter cabin fever: cut, colour, wax, pedicure - the works! Caught a wicked cold. Sadly had to give into my cold and postpone a meeting with someone who may supply product for the store, listening to the universe - and my body. In the most polite - though honest - way possible, I turned down a volunteer opportunity keeping in mind the addage: "when people show you who they are, believe them the first time." The electrician came and gave an estimate, I accepted, and he showed up and did the work. This is a miracle! We went out to our favourite restaurant to celebrate Cole's birthday. We finished watching all five seasons of "Chuck", such a wonderful show, it will be missed! I enjoyed the New Moon Goddess Celebration up at the new Zenbar studio.

In the lives of the kids:

Claire | Enjoyed her time at home and returned to Queen's with a new sense of purpose. In Kingston, we went to the mall, Loblaws and enjoyed dinner with mama and friends. She took a quick trip to Ottawa to see a friend in a production of RENT at Carleton. Lesson learned: taxis are unreliable only when you need them to be reliable. Claire sourced and signed a lease for a house next year with six friends - her priority was a washer and dryer in the house. No laundromat for my girl :) Lots of learning is happening for Claire!

Cole | Varsity rugby training has started in the bubble at school. The Semi-formal was enjoyed - with a before party at PJ's and after party at Nick's. Not sure how much time was actually spent at the dance? As much free time was spent with Hanne as was humanly possible either at her house or ours. Preparations and purchases were made for an upcoming trip to Temagami - brr! Cole just turned 17. We enjoyed a lovely mid-week dinner at his favourite restaurant. As is his way, plans are already underway for a new sport for first term next year: volleyball.

Chloé | On Chloé's behalf a meeting was had with Dr. Fasken and Dr. Aliki and it has been decided that the braces will be off a year early. Dr. Mungar took her through her paces and Chloé now have a 6-month supply of "daily" contact lenses. The semi brought with it some unkind girl drama and I'm proud of Chloé's response. The Upper School Cabaret was wonderful - even though the "mime" makeup was a "pain"! Play rehearsals keep the school days long.

Caden | Rep volleyball is keeping Caden busy outside of school and squash is his co-curricular choice for this school term. Summer camp plans are made and confirmed, with one camp already having a wait list - he's #8, it's not looking promising! Science Fair experiments were started and finished. With his buddies, Caden participated in a Leadership Workshop - in his onesie, as it was the required attire. Trip to London with Braeden and his family for a volleyball tournament that ended up cancelled due to blizzard conditions. In preparation for braces, the spacers have been installed. He ended the month with Service Day which took him to the Metro Toronto Zoo - a nice day away from desks and computers.

Life in general:

Weather | Flipping cold. The ice and wind kept us in the deep freeze for the first week of the month well into the second, third and fourth. I think we had three days of relief all month, though the cold temps has brought much sunshine. The phrase "polar vortex" is now part of our daily language. Canadians enjoy talking about the weather, but it was truly dangerous and the top national news story for weeks! I am beyond tired of the cold.

News | The weather. Pearson shut down and people waiting for days to collect their luggage. The upcoming Olympics and terror threats. PM Stephen Harper made historic trip and speech in Israel as part of a Middle East trip. Heartbreaking fire at seniors home in L'Isle-Verte, Quebec leaves 30+ dead. Value of our loonie (dollar) is sliding - this is good and bad. Justin Beiber - deported? not?

Sports | Everyone is looking forward to the Olympics. Much discussion about the Canadian hockey team being sent to the Games. Super Bowl! I'm watching golf in an effort to at least feel like I'm warming up! Eugenie Bouchard made it to the semi finals of the Australian Open, the first for a Canadian woman in 30 years.

Discovery | Cigdem Kobu has been very inspiring and I've joined her Progress Lounge. And, it looks like the year ahead should be active and illuminating. Zenbar is a lovely new spa, making plans to return.

Looking forward, goals I want to keep at the forefront include:

Work | I have to find a good accountant to clean up my taxes so I can start fresh moving forward. I also have to get a business tax number so I can get the online store all set up. I'm all signed up for a writing workshop and hope to focus on novel writing in the next few months.

Health | I'm getting a bit off track and have to start getting more sleep each night - a consistent 8+ hours. I also have to make a more mindful menu to follow each week. A menu that works in our schedule and not one I wish I could make if I had a better after school schedule.

Home | Sort through and organize all of the kids papers, files and ephemera into the boxes purchased for the purpose. Everything is in piles in my bedroom and they just have to get out of there! 100%.

Fun | Most of the supplies for the Kal Barteski class were picked up at Curry's and the rest ordered from Dick Blick. Class starts tomorrow! I am so looking forward to learning this process!

Me | I am feeling content and fulfilled. Completely calm and accepting. I have clearly defined expectations and desires. It is a strange juxtaposition of being present and engaged while still feeling somewhat "out of body" - lovely, scary and real. I am incredibly joyful and at peace for the first time in a very long time.

* * * * *

A couple of years ago I consistently wrote up posts summing up the month that had just past. Then life got both complicated and overwhelming, so much so I was just going from day-to-day in complete survival mode. With this new year I'm getting back into the practices of my past that I have missed.

around the house | january cure

One thing about living in a house with four kids, even with one away at university, there is always something to do. Something is out of place. Something needs to be done. Laundry. Dishes. Dusting. Cleaning. I'm forever living in a state of irritation with unfinished projects and clutter. To make my frustration worse, the only domestic chore I truly enjoy is folding laundry, it makes for wonderful meditation time. The rest? I clean, organize, purge and decorate in fits and starts through my days.

This year? With the help of Apartment Therapy I'm hoping to to construct a plan to increase my peace. It's taken a long time to realize, but more than anything my inner peace can be found only in an outer space of cleanliness and order.

Last week I pulled my cards for the New Year. My reading held within it a few really interesting insights. One of which was "decorate" which, after reading the full definition, made it clear that "clear the clutter" was the message. I spent 2013 clearing a lot of head and heart clutter. This year I think it's time for me to clear the physical clutter around me. This might be tougher than the work done last year! I have a number of habits that add to clutter: books, craft/art supplies, journals and projects.

THE FIRST STEP: Create a Project List

According to the site: The key is to not jump in and start doing, but to write a complete list of everything - big and small - needed to be fixed or improved within the house. This is just an initial assessment and not to be overwhelming. Just a list. Not one that has to be completed immediately.

Though I'm a bit late starting, I figured better late than never! I spent Sunday morning writing my list, from the top floor of my townhouse - where the boys reside (read: scary) - and made it all the way down to the basement and the garage. As for my back yard, which is not really a yard but a back deck, I just looked out the window and tried to remember what is located under the snow!

It took a little over an hour to complete the full 4-floors and 2500 square feet of home. I made what turns out to be a (surprisingly) not-too-overwhelming list of things that need to be completed to make me feel complete calm.

Three typed out pages.

Totally do-able. All sheets are now analyzed a bit closer and I've used my highlighters to prioritize the projects.

As much as I look forward to my kids all being home I often believe that while they're around they'll "help" me accomplish projects around the house. This holiday proved that they just want to sleep. I don't blame them! They work hard. So, it's really up to me to handle all but their spaces. Earlier this week all of the kids returned to school, and we all returned to routine.

Time for me to get busy completing the chores on my list!

around the house | project closet purge

For the last few years I've gone to tremendous effort to get healthy and lose weight. Well, it turns out, according to my doctor - and the other doctor, and the other one, too, you can be healthy and heavy. I am both. I am thankful for the healthy and ever so tired of the heavy. BUT I am no longer going to defeat myself with my closet filled half with clothes that fit and the other half with clothes that make me sad.

I've been holding onto clothes I love because I will fit in them again. I've been holding onto that idea for years. I purchase pretty simple, classic and timeless cuts, so style is not an issue. The issue is how defeated I feel every time I go in my closet or open a drawer. So one day last week I decided to go from this:

(Not a true representation as there were so many clothes on the bench on the end of my bed - so imagine this stuffed even more.) See those tags? Brand NEW clothes I've never worn. Clothes I won't ever wear.

Along with most of the clothes in my dresser, they ended up:

in these three super sized garbage bags which were promptly delivered to the clothing bin behind the local grocery store.

Now, I have this:

My plan? Because I always have to have a plan, is to not purchase anything - unless it is a direct replacement - for the next year. I'm done with purchasing things "in case" or "for the day when". I have everything I am possibly going to need to get me through. I am never throwing out items with a tag on them EVER again. The disappointment I felt in myself was crushing while going through the process, but results were completely liberating.

This was a wonderful project.

Now to organize the linen closet!

things we do | september, the new january

family favourite: lemon garlic chicken, mama rice and roasted broccoli

I love lists. I love order. I love schedules. I love my calendar.

I dwell in structure.

As far as that nasty seven letter word - control - I've pretty much given that nonsense over to the universe, but there are some things that are still within my domain. What? That would be my daily schedule.

As much as things change, some things stay the same. This summer was pretty spontaneous with the kids very much in charge. I went to a talk during our last school year where the speaker emphasized the acceptance of painful non-catastrophic mistakes made by our children. Well, I made room for plenty over the last few months! I have to say, my kids were (and still are) pretty remarkable. We learned a lot from each other. Lots of growth, understanding, acceptance and love. An enjoyable feat given that there is just me and four children between the ages of 13 and 17!

But, as always, I digress ...

Moving forward, I'm embracing the idea that I can only organize my days in a loose enough way to allow for change. I suppose my life has evolved to include "guidelines" as opposed to rigid plans. We're off to a late start this year as the school trip to the Northern Campus started the first week of the school year. Now that all of my kids are back and we can settle into the school year, this autumn brings with it a Morning Routine, an Evening Routine and (for me) a Write & Create Routine.

I ask a lot of my routine. It has to take into consideration four things:

1. I run a household as sole provider;
2. I have been unwell and need to get healthier;
3. I need to respect and nourish my creative side; and,
4. I must figure out how to develop a full - and fulfilling - future for myself.

The yin and yang of it all - tight schedules leaving enough time for self. Tough.

My days start at 6:00AM and end at 10:00PM.

MORNING ROUTINE

06:00    Alarm set to go off & Coffee maker programmed to start

             Brush Teeth & Wash Up

             Put on walking clothes & lace up sneakers

             Make smoothie, take meds & supplements

06:30    Write morning pages

07:30    Take kids to school and go for walk

10:00    MON: Errands, Appointments, Bills, Calls & Correspondence

             TUES - FRI: Write & Create

EVENING ROUTINE

10:00    Shut down everything: computer, television, lights

              Fill dishwasher and empty sink (if not already done)

              Head upstairs and wash up

              Set alarm & fitbit

              Settle in by 10:30

within all of that is my

CREATIVE ROUTINE

MONDAY: Morning Pages, Life Coach Session, The Next Chapter & The Desire Map

TUESDAY: Morning Pages, Writing

WEDNESDAY: Morning Pages, Creative Pursuits

THURSDAY: Morning Pages, Writing

FRIDAY: Morning Pages, Artist's Date, Blurb Project, Photography

SATURDAY: Morning Pages, Read & Research, Project Life

SUNDAY: Morning Pages, Read & Research

Though everything has been simplified it has not been reduced. There is a ton of content and I'm excited to start all of the creative challenges.

DINNER ROUTINE

Ah, the bane of my existence: "what do you want for dinner?" is being answered with a very simple:

MONDAY: Crock Pot

TUESDAY: Chicken

WEDNESDAY: Pasta or Pizza

THURSDAY: New (a chance to experiment!)

FRIDAY: Fish or Seafood

SATURDAY: Take Out or Go Out

SUNDAY: Beef

I am very fortunate that my kids are provided a good hot meal for lunch at school, but I want to make sure they eat well while at home, too. There are a few favourites and within their schedule I'll make sure they get them as often as we can manage.

And with that, order is restored!

Until it's not ...

Guidelines ... guidelines.

list | 10 of 52

52 LISTS | Week Ten | LIST THE WAYS YOU CAN CLEANSE FOR SPRING

• Change furnace filter
• Purge furnace room
• Clean out basement entry and front entry closets
• Walk – every day
• Swim – at least 3x each week
• Drink more water and/or green tea every day
• Reconcile all documents and prep for upcoming (divorce) case conference – such a long process!
• Purge closet and dresser drawers
• Unsubscribe from all emails that are of no further interest
• Find a replacement for Google Reader!
• Update "Control Journal" with new and upcoming activities
• Dedicate time, every day, to be still – and quiet
• Take another photo walk; plan another, and then another
• Journal, for me, every day
• Turn the television off at 10PM
• Read before bed
• Stick to consuming minimal refined sugar (still stuck with my single teaspoon of “raw” sugar in my coffee each morning)
• Map out plantings and use of outdoor space for this summer
• Choose colours for rooms in need of freshening
• Map out and hang all photos & paintings
• Sort and purge all “creative” tools and supplies. Keep only the things that will bring me joy and fulfillment moving forward.
• Go through all of the “great articles” discovered while doing the ONE little WORD vision board and read – file if worthwhile, toss if not
• The linen closet is a disaster, decide what to keep and donate the rest. Put all linens together by bed-set and wrap in pillow case
• Have kids go through all books and purge for school sale
• Have kids go through all closets and purge clothes for donation or hand-me-down to the next in line :)
• Go through first aid and medicine cupboard and update

CHALLENGE: This week I will Spring clean by ...

• going through all of the financial and household files, currently in a pile, and put them in proper folders for easy locating!

around the house | book purge

One of my favourite things in my home are my bookshelves. They're huge and hold so many things that make me happy! What doesn't make me happy is the clutter. I really have to learn that in order to bring in a new book, one has to go. I recently managed to fill up two cases of books to donate.

BOOKSHELVES BEFORE:

BOOKSHELVES AFTER

It was a big job, but well worth it!

The Oakville Literacy Council holds a big used book sale at Hopedale Mall in the spring; in addition, there is going to be a book collection at the kids' school run by the Middle School Council from April 8-18. This has provided me with motivation to get to and purge the rest of the bookshelves in the house! There is a large Ikea Expedit shelving unit in each bedroom, each needing a purge and tidy-up. 

Then again, another option is this idea I came across a little while back: a little outdoor book garden. Another time and place and this would been fun!

How do you manage your books?

around the house | photographs

Over the last while I've realized it's past time I get my bedroom finished. Now that I have a new bed (wonderful!) and sheets, I want to add in something to make my room reflect it's occupant: me! The best way? Photos. My photos.

What I thought would be a quick project turned into a major undertaking with me going through 40,000+ images to pick out my favourites. I narrowed it down to fifteen non-child photos. (I figure I need one room in the house to be a no-kid zone!) I converted them all to black and white, 12" x 12" to go into black Ikea frames with white mats. My walls are painted Benjamin Moore Rusty Nail (CC-390) and my bedding is white. I think this will be perfect! I'm having 5 frames above my black iron headboard and plan to change the sets 3x each year for a bit of variety :)

These are the photos chosen:

They've all been uploaded to Persnickety Prints for printing - in both colour and black and white. A girl never knows when she'll change her decorating mind :)

This was a wonderful opportunity to become re-acquainted with all of my photos - well, those I still posess! Certainly the number on my computer can be cut in half with all of the team - hockey, football, lacrosse, baseball and more - photos taken over the years. I can delete a huge number that will never live anywhere but on my hard drive.

I'm curious, how do you bring "you" into your living space?

real right now | bathroom renovation

My new home feels like one big (unanticipated) fix-it project.

I am starting to believe that the homes that need fixing find me or maybe it's simply that most of the property built in this area within the last 25 years was slapped together without much mind to craftmanship or pride, but we're onto another project.

(Yes, I had an inspection but most of the issues were well masked by the previous owners. Sigh.)

Fortunately, my imagination had recently turned to "what if" scenarios and one of those was "what if I redid the master bath". I already know the materials and the look, I just hadn't anticipated the timing.

The time is now!

I left with the kids for our adventures in the Maritimes over the Thanksgiving Weekend on Wednesday evening and the bathroom looked like "before". We arrived home late last night to see the "after". Even better? NOT A SPECK OF DUST or debris or any mess whatsoever. My room was draped in plastic and much care was taken to protect the house. I am very pleased.

I am not sure what the week will bring, but I know I'm off to Pottery Barn to purchase a new vanity and then to Hamilton to buy fixtures.

Fingers crossed this project finishes up as well as it started :) I can't wait to see how it turns out!

real right now | downsized

A year ago today the kids and I moved from a huge home, huge yard, huge lake view to a smaller home. Smaller as in no: no yard, no view, no size.

We love it.

We didn't have to move, it was a collective decision to close one chapter and start another. I recognized years ago that we were, what I call, a "drop-and-go family". Home from school, drop your books, get your equipment and go to the activity. The big house was nothing but a big burden as it didn't reflect our lifestyle. Ever. At all.

I've lived in many homes in my lifetime - from an 8x8 foot dorm room to a substantial home in a posh neighbourhood and everything in between. This 2,640 square foot, 3-storey, 5 bedroom, 4.5 bathroom townhouse is perfect for us, right now, for a lot of reasons:

1. Easier to maintain. A smaller home requires less time, energy, and effort to accomplish any given task - from cleaning the kitchen to vacuuming the stairs to dusting the shelves. Way less time is spent cleaning!

2. Less chore burdens. My kids still do chores, but their entire weekend is not dedicated to maintaining lawns, cleaning decks, or the endless arguments over why some things did not get done. I have found that the fun of the big yard is always sabotaged by the burden of maintaining one.

3. Less expensive. This home was less expensive to purchase, less expensive to keep (insurance, taxes, heating/cooling, etc.), less expensive to decorate with limited floor and wall space. Though there have been some expenses moving into a 10-year old townhouse (new air conditioner, new appliances, exterior work) it would have been the same moving into any 10-year old structure. Another benefit would be the reduced debt/risk. At this age and stage, why maximize my debt:risk ratio? After dealing with huge risk, this is comfortable and just what I need right now.

4. Encourages family bonding. Many of my friends and family buy bigger homes to encourage more opportunities for entertainment and interaction with each other. I did the same, many times. I've found that this, a smaller open-concept home has resulted in more social interaction among us and less distraction with toys and games - real or virtual. Certainly there is more talk and inclusion in an increasingly more silent and private (computer and iPhone) world. This, I have to say, is the primary benefit of this new home.

5. Embrace minimalism. Moving into a smaller home has forced us all to intentionally pare down our belongings and only surround ourselves with the things we love. It also forces us to accumulate less. If there's no room to put it there's little opportunity to give in to temptation. It has been a slow purge, but I can say that those things the kids and I have kept we love.

6. Increased mindfulness. Not only of our neighbours - only a wall away, but of each other. Noise is kept to a minimum and tidy is kept to a maximum with everyone is more considerate of clearing the way of shoes and belongings. My kids now have a more finely tuned sense of community with all of us sharing space with each other. With the closer quarters, I love how my kids interact with the elder members of our community as well as the baby next door.

7. Less environmental impact. A smaller home requires fewer resources to build and less resources to maintain. And that benefits all of us.

8. Less social competition. We live in a very competitive, upwardly-mobile community where the old addage "bigger is better" is a way of life. "Everyone" drives around in flashy SUVs, wearing designer duds on their way to and from the trendiest of restaurants or stores. This move has eliminated that niggling urge to engage with Mr. and Mrs. Jones. Though I do have the big SUV, it was a pragmatic purchase, not a flashy one.

9. Fewer arguments. Though we now live in a far more central central area we live in a "no party house". Perfect. The kids meet their friends at Harvey's or Starbucks or Town Square and though I love it when the house is full of my kids and their friends, they have deemed it not party worthy.

Less is less. As in less to worry about! Fewer possessions and fewer worries.

Now, I know a 5 bedroom home is HUGE by most standards, but compared to what we were moving from, this is less than half the size size and it is double the joy.

Regrets? None. Though, I do, on occasion, miss my view of the lake. On those days, I tie up my sneakers and walk the 1Km to the lakeshore. See? Another benefit - I move more! We live in walking distance to almost everything - school, park, library, pool, downtown, grocery store, rink ... extra bonus, I save on the wear and tear on my truck and the cost of gas!

Learning to Linger

Linger.

Such a seductive word.

Hey, I need a little seduction right now, so I'm learning to linger.

I have had a bad habit of rushing through things to get to the next. I often don't enjoy and savour what I'm doing in an effort to get to the next thing. I am learning to slow down, take my time and linger.

• Now I've learned to show up at school to pick up the kids a little early. Instead of being anxious in the parking lot, I use the time to read, write a list, watch the interaction between students/parents, make calls to schedule and confirm appointments. Okay, so sometimes my linger is a bit productive!
• I am trying to carve out "white space" on my weekly calendar. I use my time running errands more efficiently, grouping things by area of town, or nature of errand, so I can take the saved time to read a book or magazine, a blog or online article. (After re-reading perhaps I could use this time to *gasp* exercise!)
• I no longer feel compelled to compete with - or feel inadequate around - the "list mums", those ladies who can (from memory) rattle off an endless list of all the things they are going to accomplish that day. From the Starbucks who made their coffee inadequately to mani/pedi and haircut to grocery shopping for the gourmet meal they'll make that evening to sharpening skates for the game they'll cheer to painting class or jazzercize or private trainer. You, my dears, can have your list!
• Meals are now bigger and more complex if we have the time. No one says we have to eat by a particular time. If we have activities early in the evening, we just eat a bit later. If we have activities later, we eat a bit earlier. I'm learning to enjoy the process of shopping (well, writing up the list after perusing recipes) and preparing food, every day.
• I turn on music, pick up a magazine, grab a blanket and curl up on the couch in the middle of the day. What? Yes, I do. All fear of criticism and distain is gone!
• This new sense of delay is everywhere - even in my shower! I am notorious for my 5-minute shower. This is usually because I am the last one and there is no hot water left. Now with the new tank, I revel in a few extra minutes of washing my troubles down the drain!

My lingering all seems to be pretty active. Probably not the real definition of the word! But I am getting there. I'm hoping to take a few classes in meditation in the spring. In the meantime, perhaps instead of picking up anything, I could just turn on music and simply breathe rather than picking up a book or magazine!

New Space = New Colours

Though we are still stuck in "transition" with half of our furniture in the old house for staging purposes, we've been able to get some stuff done in our new place to make it feel like home. The very first thing we did was pick colours. Personally, this is my favourite aspect of moving!

This time around we changed things up completely! No more earth tones in the main areas - which is now just one HUGE room, the whole main floor - and the kids were able to not just pick their colours but to paint their own rooms. That was an adventure.

It's a huge job to transform a whole new house and I was happy for some help cutting-in. There was a TON of that to do!

As much as I loved my "Maple Syrup" and "Spiced Rum" of the old place, I fell in love with the idea of having gray walls and decided on:

HC-164 Puritan Gray

On the wall it is a bit more blue than I had expected, but since I was going for a complete change it really was in keeping with the theme!

All of the trim is my usual (thanks to my step-mum who, close to 20 years ago, recommended it):

CC-100 Flurry

Claire has been begging for bright green for ages now and when you decend into her room you'd think you were entering a space ship for the glow:

2031-40 Spring Garden Green

Chloe decided on a "feature wall" with the same green (convenient, or totally manipulative of her mother?) and the other three walls covered an odd taupy-beigy-pink with:

CC-110 Muslin

The boys are so funny, a study in contrast, and their colours are so reflective of their personalities. Cole went with his favourite from our old house, the colour of our kitchen, the invigorating:

CC-92 Autumn Leaf (Canada only)

And Caden chose the soothing:

2050-50 Waterfall

Me? Well, I really LOVED my old room - especially the colour. Since this one is not that much different in size, I thought I'd just stick with what I like:

CC-390 Rusty Nail

What a mish-mash of colour!

What is your home like? Do the colours flow seamlessly from hue to hue or does it reflect the range of personalities and tastes of the occupants?

I promise, once we're fully furnished, assets divided, and the last picture is hung on all well painted walls, I'll post pics :)

Reflections | July 2011

Are you getting tired of hearing that we were busy? Well, this month things did slow down ... a tad. The pace was a little different with more spontaneous days and complete lack of structure. I have to say, for a control freak like myself, it was a challenge!

Adding to the slower pace: our annual holiday in Cape Cod!

The kids really enjoyed the freedom the month had to offer with requests to go here, there and everywhere. Pushing boundaries and rules every minute of every day. With all that going on, we managed:

• Cole participated in the training camp for Rugby Ontario. He was chosen in the position of lock for the U14 team. Plans were quickly underway for tournaments in Ottawa and BC!
• Both Chloe and Caden needed to get new glasses. They look fabulous in their new frames! Even better? They can see.
• I finally got in with our naturopath with my blood test results. He switched things up a bit and things are all working together now. Feeling better every day.
• Passports were collected and consent papers were signed. We were all set for our annual drive to the seashore.
• Claire has re-joined rugby this year and she is enjoying herself.
• Caden is a hooker and a very aggressive rugby player. He really enjoys tackling! He's pretty good at is as he's had plenty of practice over the years with Cole as his teacher!
• There were a number of pool parties - planned and unplanned. Tons of fun! Thank you to our many friends with refreshing water in their yards.
• Cole managed to keep up a crazy pace of Rugby playing for his local Crusaders club as well as the Ontario Blues. He's being injured regularly, but he loves it. The worst injury was a questionable concussion right before we left on holiday. Good timing! Not.
• We took care of him with regular visits to the chiro and RMT. The boy has to find a sport that doesn't regularly turn him into a pretzel.
• Caden loves his hockey and has managed to run away with the penalty title at 3on3 over at Canlan. You just have to roll your eyes. He's so mild mannered off the ice - and off the pitch :)
• Chloe continues to sing up a storm. We're organizing singing and piano lessons in the fall. Any recommendations are welcome!
• I'm also looking for a math tutor, for all of them :) Confidence is key, right? They are good, but not confident, so I need someone to bolster that aspect. Recommendations?
• My very social teenagers are enjoying life as teenagers. There is a ton of drama, lots of questions, tons of laughter, some very off-colour and crude humour, more spontaneity than I can handle, and I now think I know every neighbourhood in Oakville! There really should be a gas subsidy for mothers of teens.
• Someone has to tell my kids that I really do not need to go onto match.com or any other type of coupling site. Really. (But they are so funny about getting me "out there" and dating. Cracks me up. They are so lovely and concerned and funny.)
• Caden took me by surprise suggesting his ideal change in my domestic situation - which made me react with an extreme "throw the baby out with the bathwater" knee-jerk response. I've now relaxed and realized he's only just eleven and he's entitled to his outlandish ideas. I, on the other hand, am not.
• Claire and her good friend Nikki headed into Toronto via the GO train to see Hugh Jackman in his one man show. They were overwhelmed with how wonderful it was - going on and on about how lovely he was - and how they were the youngest members of his audience! Gotta love girls that recognize good looks and talent no matter the age :)
• Disappointed that Cole was unable to attend the Mini Chowder Cup in Foxboro. We were 90 minutes away, with his equipment, but we didn't want to risk his "possible" concussion and turn it into a more serious issue. Lounging at the beach was better for his recovery than a hockey tournament.
• In order to not disrupt the seaside holiday of all my kids, I took Cole home early to make it to the rugby gams vs Lindsay then on to the Ottawa tournament. Often, due to Cole's athletic success - and previously, Claire's athletic success - sacrifices have had to be made. This time around, with much thanks to a helpful community, the only one disrupted was me!
• We received an impossibly low offer on our house. Insulting, really. What are people thinking? At least offer what we paid for the place!
• Our holiday was wonderful. HOT and sticky, and wonderful. So nice to see Grampy and Nanna in such a relaxed and low-key environment. Lazy days were spent at the beach; playing croquet on the lawn; learning to drive (Claire); learning to play pool; listening to new summer music; eating watermelon, ice cream and seafood; mall shopping (ugh); reading summer fluff; napping and lounging around. It was a bit too hot for a few things - tennis or go carting, but fun nonetheless!
• While away I was featured on the Simple Aussie Girls blog. So honoured!
• We were so happy my sister Beth and her family made it up early so we could have a BBQ with them before we had to leave for home.
• I am amazed at the number of people on the road talking, texting, even using their computers in their cars! And speeding. Sigh. Caden observed this behaviour and commented that it was only mums with kids in their vehicles that seemed to drive the speed limit with few distractions. (Little does he know how distracting the kids can be!)
• I participated in the Ali Edwards-lead A Week In The Life project and it's slowly being put together. I went 100% digi this year. LOVE the results! Now just have to find the right printer.
• It seemed much like the month-without-Cole with him being so involved in his rugby. The Ontario Blues U14 team did well in Lindsay then on to Ottawa for the U16 tournament to prepare them for the competition in British Columbia. All I know is there is a big difference between a U14 rugby player and a U16 rugby player - and that is usually around 40 pounds of muscle!
• The end of July has Cole (still) in British Columbia with his team. They are representing themselves well and Cole has fallen in love with BC.
• Much of our time is spent doing very little inside or outdoors, in order to keep the house spotless. The hot and humid was gone - and now it's back. So tired of summer!
• Upon our return we were right back into rugby. Oh, how I prefer the character of this sport to hockey. It is far more brutal but it is also far more honest. I'm thinking I'd love to see some of those SOBs from hockey try to survive a season of rugby - if they did, they'd no longer be SOBs, of that I'm sure.
• I also returned to some drama regarding the new abode. Turns out the sellers want to back out of the part of the deal that made it a deal. Holy smokes! Heaven and earth has now been moved and we're back on track. Though 15 days delayed. Some stress I just don't need.
• I am reading! Fiction! By chance, when walking through Barnes & Noble I found The Girl Who Chased the Moon and it was lovely, enchanting. Once done with it, I ran out and got Garden Spells and will be on the look out for any and all books by Sarah Addison Allen in the future!
• I may have lost a son for a couple of weeks, but Nikki has filled his spot and I still have four to look after, and I'm happy for it. She's a lovely girl.
• Chloe started private singing lessons with her OCC choir director, Janet. She loves it and I love that she has a passion for it.
• Through summer our Pub Nights are a bit few and far between, but the last evening of the month saw us over at the Abbey Arms. I haven't been there in 10+ years. It was good - as long as they can pour beer and wine it's a good pub experience, right?

And with July finished that brings us to August. We still have six weeks before the kids get back to the routine of school and I desperately miss having a routine! This summer has been far more hectic than most and I'm feeling a bit discombobulated. The kids are loving every minute of it with no structure to our days and the embrace of lazy!

Studio Chaos

Do you think the Simple Scrapper will be able to help me with this mess:

I hope so!

Tomorrow, Jennifer is starting a FREE online course: FINALLY GET ORGANIZED: a decluttering and simplicity workshop for Scrapbookers. It is running from April 25 - 29 and I'M IN!

Included is:

4 Keys to Finally Getting Organized

plus these brand new email lessons:

Easily Take Stock of your Scrapbook Supplies
One Little Quiz to Help you Simplify and Prioritize
Create your Scrapbook Supply Battle Plan
The Most Effective Strategies for Making it Work

I don't know about you but you saw the photos above, I am really ready to finally get organized. I'm all signed up, are you?

Project: Simplify :: Hot Spot 01

Last week I did my best to ignore the fact there was snow coating every surface outside my house and embrace the idea of SPRING cleaning inside my house. This week’s hot spot: wardrobe and closet.

This is a weird project for me since the idea was to touch touch every single item of clothing in my wardrobe, and make a decision whether it stays or goes. While this is a BRILLIANT idea, since I'm now in the midst of another project, my effort to make less of me, it was quite a challenge! I am happy to report I was able to donate, organize and list items within the Monday-Friday timeframe. (For me it was Monday-Thursday as Friday was spent in a rink!)

I liked that the very first area assigned for this project was my wardrobe. An unlikely starting point, but such a relief now that it is DONE! Like most mums, I don't spend a lot of time focused on me and most of the areas that are a mess in my house are MINE! It was fun to focus only on me for a change.

I am a believer in modeling behaviour in order to encourage good choices in my kids and I have to (sadly) admit that by not taking care of myself, I have failed in that regard. I must be more mindful of this from now on.

Now that my closet - and as a result my bedroom chairs - are cleaned up, purged and organized, I'm ready to tackle the next project! Can I tell you how nice it is to get ready in only a few minutes? Everything has its proper place and I am now surrounded only by the things I love. Well half the things I love - I refused to clean the "other" half of the closet as my "other half" can take care of his own things!

THIS IS HOW I DID IT:

I loved the system outlined to complete this project. It really is all about having the right tools. I modified the list to reflect the materials I have here in the house. I refused to purchase anything for this project and so far, so good. (Though I do have a couple of things on a list!)

• extra hangers
• a large garbage bag (black) for items to “give”
• a smaller garbage bag (white) for items to “toss”
• camera
• cleaning supplies: rags, soap & water

I followed the basic plan for attacking my wardrobe:

1. Make sure all your clothes are washed and in one place. (CHECK - what a bear of a project this was making sure my laundry was all done.)
2. Set aside all items you already know you don’t want — wearable in the “give” box; unwearable in the “toss” box. (CHECK - this was the fastest part of the whole project)
3. Try on all the rest of your clothes — no cheating. (CHECK with an asterisk - I cheated. Why? My plan is to get down to a size 18 from my current 22, maybe size 16 if I go crazy! I'm loathe to toss or donate anything classic and will go through the process when I settle on whatever size I become - probably some time around back to school season.)
4. Anything that doesn’t fit well, put in a separate pile. (This will be done when #3 is completed with no cheating next time!)
5. Anything that isn’t the right color on you, put in the “give” box. (CHECK - this was easy and yielded two articles of clothing.)
6. Anything that has un-mendable holes or stains, is unwearable, or underwear that’s seen better days, put in the “toss” box. (CHECK - this was easy as I do this regularly in the laundry room and yielded zero articles of clothing.)
7. Once your closet and drawers are empty, clean them. (CHECK)
8. Hang, fold, and put away the clothes you know you’re keeping. (CHECK - but I have to say, being 5'11" makes for long clothes and it's hard to fold pants and make them fit regular sized shelves. Frustrating. Maybe I should have rolled everything?)
9. Reassess the items in your doesn’t-fit-well pile. (Again, once the #3 assesment is done this will be part of the process.)
10. Tackle your shoes, jewelry, and other accessories. (CHECK and since I'm not much of a shoe or jewelry collector, relatively easy. Scarves on the other hand? TONS and I kept every last one of them!)

I was thankful for the tips set out at the start and I employed most of them:

1. Work quickly - I stuck with my first response to every single item. It really helped me make it through. I don't know why it is when you hit the 90% done point you are ready to stop, it was well worth grinding through to the end.

2. Use your mirror and camera - I did neither. I have no full length mirror (I know, I have issues) and doing this alone the camera was no help. I went more by feel.

3. Know your colours - and I do. I live in BLACK, WHITE, BROWN and RED. With a few pieces of purple and camel thrown in for variety.

4. You probably wear the same 10 items - so true. Well loved, but becoming well worn. I decided early last year that I would not purchase anything new until I had a new body - in January I rededicated myself to that goal, with better tools and better decisions. I have to tell you things are getting pretty desperate and I may end up in rags at the rate I'm going!

5. Analyze why something doesn’t quite fit - which I did. I love her tip: "If there’s something you know looks good on you, but you can’t quite wear it right now (breastfeeding, anyone?), store it out of the way — but not too out of the way that you forget you own it." I have too much storage space in my closet, so I used the centre island unit for all of the clothes I hope to wear in the VERY NEAR FUTURE.

6. Don't donate clothes that won't sell - I was puzzled that this would be on this list only because it never would occur to me to give the work to someone else, but I'm sure there's a reason.

7. Label yard sale items immediately - ha! NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER again. I will only toss or donate. Yard sale? Eek!

8. Deal with your "give box" this week - done. Amazing when I do a project start to finish, it starts and it finishes and it is done completely. What a wonderful relief! I'm fortunate to pass the donate bin about 4 times a day. I had no excuses!

On to the next hot spot!

Project: Simplify

As I posted on Friday, today is the start of Project: Simplify over at simplemom.net and I'm ready to get started. I read through the grapevine that Environment Canada has announced that we are to expect three more months, yes MONTHS of winter, so I have to simulate spring in some way, so cleaning and simplifying is my method of choice!

If you're on board, and checked out the simplemom.net post on Friday, you'll know that the pre-assignment was to come up with a family statement of purpose.

(click to enlarge)

You can see we borrowed bits from Tsh, but for the most part it is all us. It's all done and ready to take over to Fortino's later today and have an 8"x10" print made. I'll put it in the family room, or kitchen, as a regular reminder. If you're wondering about the missing "god" bits? The simple explanation is that I have four kids in various stages of belief and disbelief, I want to make this concept of a family statement of purpose accessible and not create any unnecessary conflict - for now.

What about you? Do you have a statement of purpose for your family? Have you considered one? Up until this point we've had a certain commonality of understanding, but nothing was concrete and written down. I don't know that this could have been done much before now but am I ever glad it's done!

Now it's time to work on the assignment. I'll post the before and after shots of my hot spot later in the week. Good luck working on yours!

RANT :: Crumbs (and other small messes)

Do not read further if you are looking for a happy encouraging start to your day! Optimism and positivity will return tomorrow. When my house is clean.

I don't know about you, but I spent most of my weekend in a rink. Well, to be precise, I was in four rinks - from downtown Toronto to Welland. I managed close to 400km on the truck.

My weekend was a bit busier than usual, but not much. Though, with only limited time before the holidays, it did put a crimp in my plans and nothing got done around my house - except for the bomb that apparently went off in every single room.

RANT BEGINS ::

Every time I walked into the house there were again, more crumbs on the counter and inevitably on the floor, clothing on the floor as they missed the bins and a full dishwasher worth of plates, cups and bowls in the overflowing kitchen sink. Not one bed was made and not one newspaper picked up or cup put in the dishwasher - or even the sink! Maybe because it was overflowing. Not just that but someone apparently thought they wanted to break apart some corrugated boxes and then lost interest - and left me a gift of cardboard pieces to dispose scattered all over the family room floor.

Grr.

I left a list.

Hello?

Clearly that list got lost under some homework or laundry or crumbs. Goodness knows it didn't make its way into a garbage can.

Who needs a list when the mess is so obvious everywhere!

I'm exhausted with the realization that I will clean it all up. All day today.

Why?

Because I cannot wait until the end of school to have my kids figure it out and clean up. I cannot stand mess. I cannot stand sticky. I cannot stand the utter disrespect for my time or my surroundings. I am tired of lecturing the kids, encouraging the kids, begging the kids to clean up after themselves. I've tried everything.

Except, I've never just cleaned it up. I've always waited and made them clean up after themselves. Clearly there is no impact.

To save my sanity, I have to sign off for the day and grab a big garbage bag!

:: RANT ENDS Thank you for your patience!

My iPod is now charged, garbage bag collected, recycle bin is at the ready. I can start. My reward? A clean house and (fingers crossed) time to make stuff later on today.

A little off track ...

My plan this morning was to deal with this:

I left to take Claire and Cole to school with instruction for Chloe and Caden to clear every surface in the house and move it onto the kitchen island. I live in a land of PILES. Drives me crazy but it's a thing I've been doing forever and have no plans to change. I suppose we all need some part of our character to accept - or crab about :)

Instead, I got distracted, by the lovely Ali Edwards who has a habit of distracting me.

Thank goodness!

Today she typed out a list of those things that are inspiring her currently. The timing is perfect, as I have been mulling a few of her categories. Why? I have no clue, but I like the idea of recording it.

 

COLOR : I'm told it's called French Blue. Kind of blue, kind of green, kind of gray. I've never been a fan of blue, but I do like this.

FONT : I've seen this Bead Chain font in a few places lately, and downloaded it. Plans to use it soon!

(I'm also totally distracted trying to find this font:

from over at The Inspired Room, any ideas?)

PATTERN : I'm currently obsessed with Houndstooth. I even bought a new golf umbrella because of the pattern. (Yes, a golf umbrella - too cold to golf, and by buying it I've stopped the rains from coming. I have powah!)

SHAPE : Circle. Always circles. Soon to help me make sugar cookies :)

LETTER : O. I live with my little Ouellette family in Oakville which is in Ontario.

NUMBER : 4 – it's not really a "lucky" number, but one that pops up in my life most often! Enough that I notice it :) 

WORD : Do. I've been focusing on my "word" for 2011 I keep coming back to "do". It might stick!

What's inspiring you today? Even if you don't blog about it, take some time to feel all of the inspiration around you!

Hey, look at that! I got this post done and this is still waiting for me:

There is always something, isn't there? Love it!

Spinning Wheels ...

(Our days have been gray and drab, this punch of pink welcomes everyone who comes to our door)

Do you ever have one of those days where you're just spinning wheels? For me, this is one of those days.

Clearly a cosmic theme: over breakfast I watched an interview with David Clayton-Thomas. I have so much to do, I am getting nothing done! Since being sick I am out of sorts - lost my rhythm - and really trying to get my act together.

The top five things I'd like to accomplish, besides laundry, over the weekend are:

1. Photo tour through Bronte to take in and capture the full effect of autumn at the harbour. The weather is supposed to be lovely over the weekend so I should take advantage!
2. Sort and organize materials for my December Daily project. Ali Edwards has some brilliance on her site. What a great project, I'm looking forward to starting (and finishing) my first one!
3. Edit and purge from my iPhoto which has grown, again, to over 25,000 images!
4. Print all of the 8x10 photos for my 70 Days of Summer album, photograph the results and share them here!
5. Scrapfest is being held in Oshawa today and tomorrow. My plan is to head out first thing in the morning to go see, shop and visit and be back in time for Cole's hockey game at 3PM. Whew!

So, with that being planned, I have to:

1. Wash the kitchen floors
2. Scrub the master bathroom and probably the over-used main floor powder room
3. Print out the calendar for the next couple of weeks and update the Control Journal
4. Prep the ingredients for Thai Chicken, a favourite, for dinner
5. And yes, put another load in the washer and fold the clothes in the dryer

Tonight will be blissfully quiet with only one event: Claire and Cole head to yoga. Who knows, I might even get a chance to watch Blue Bloods tonight. I've really wanted to catch that show.

Happy Friday!

*8 Things: Challenges for October

There is always something to do, isn't there?

Now that I've fully participated in the Celes-lead Live a Better Life Challenge, I feel more confident and refreshed. In that month I've managed to accept some stuff, toss some stuff and got the kids off to a pretty smooth start to their school year, it's now time for me to focus on home. I know I've been kvetching about the state of our abode for a while - the sheer volume of stuff threatens to overwhelm. I realize it is a function of big space and many children, but it's daunting and relentless.

Now that the holiday and entertaining season is upon us, I'd like my home tidy and organized enough that when I take out the seasonal decorations it LOOKS like an effort was made to decorate. I don't want it to look like an extention of the clutter of hockey gear, laundry and backpacks.

Another challenge to the rescue. Not only that, but there is really more than one ... there are EIGHT!

Last month, through a very typical blog journey, I stumbled upon the most wonderful blog and the very first post I read was a 31 Day Challenge for October. Not only is she offering a 31 Days to a Less Messy Nest (hello! me, waving, this is for ME!) she has teamed up with seven friends who are offering 31 Day Challenges of their own:

:: 31 Days to Stress-Free Entertaining from Sandy at The Reluctant Entertainer
:: 31 Days to a Better Photo from Darcy at Life With My 3 Boybarians
:: 31 Days to More with Less from Jen at Balancing Beauty and Bedlam
:: 31 Days of Autumn Bliss from Melissa at The Inspired Room
:: 31 Days of Living Simply from Emily at Remodeling This Life
:: 31 Days to an Inspired Table from Kendra at My First Kitchen
:: 31 Days of Grace from Emily at Chatting at the Sky

THERE AREN'T ENOUGH DAYS to take in all of this goodness. But I'm going to give it my best shot.

Around the House: Overgrown

When we moved into our home a few years back we knew there was a lot of work to do, inside and out. Typical of where we live, the landscaping was done about 20 years ago and the idea was to fill everything in as quickly as possible for immediate "full garden" appeal rather than patiently letting everything grow.

When we moved in, that first summer we cut everything back and pulled out a number of plants. I thought our first go-round was pretty ruthless. 

Then I remembered, everything grows!

This was taken last week:

Full heavy blooms on the Rose of Sharon, so gorgeous especially on gray and rainy days. Totally not good for the plant, but it did make for some really lovely photographs in the last couple of years.

Now?

That's more than a bit bare! When those gorgeous blossoms all ended up in the woodchipper I was sad; but, relieved as well. We may just have saved the plant and it will have many more years to share her blooms.

We don't have a large property, but last week it was full to bursting with plant life. Now it is, in contrast, a bit barren. I'm resisting the temptation to fill it up, after all, that's how this trouble started in the first place!

[For those wondering: Louis left himself three projects (plus the surprise rebar found in the back garden). There are three stumps from pine trees that were planted poorly (the burlap and metal were never removed) and the men left about 3 feet of stump for Louis to worry back and forth out of the ground. I shake my head. Just one more unfinished project, but Louis just seems to need to leave himself something to do. Sigh.]

Now that the demolition is done, I think we'll leave any planting until the Spring. It will give me time to research what might compliment what is left, and give me some time to mull some ideas I've been considering for a while. I'm not much of a gardener, but I do enjoy designing gardens.

In the meantime I'm in search of new photography subjects!

Summer is Here!

A typical summer day. Aah. So relaxing.

Technically I'm a bit late as the equinox was on the 21st! But, as of the afternoon school bell today, the youngers are out for summer. They can now join the olders who have been out on holiday, after surviving ASCENT and exams, since the 18th. They've been celebrating by sleeping!

I am going to unplug for a bit. I've been blogging consistently every day for a while now. I enjoy it immensely. I am afforded the luxury of daily blogging because the kids are busy at school all day and now those days are over until September. I remember last year it was really hard to keep up, so this year I'm not making a commitment to blogging daily. Just every once in a while, when the urge or inspiration hits!

Who knows, the spontaneity of summer might be good for me. Or not. I do not function well without framework. I will surely have some kind of breakdown, or epiphany, or both. Or maybe I'll finally learn to embrace the simple joy and freedom of it all. In any case, if you're around, stop by.

Bring wine :)

Lest you fear boredom will set in, the plans for summer include:

• Gardening/Landscaping (including the taking down of a 3-storey spruce tree in our front yard)
• Celebrations: Louis birthday (today) and Canada Day (on July 1st) and my birthday finishes off the season (on September 4th)
• Football season runs through the end of July for Cole
• Drinking lots of water
• Rugby goes through to September for Claire
• Purging paper piles
• 3 on 3 Hockey for Caden runs through August
• Invite friends over for dinner
• Removing all the nasty prickly-weeds in our back yard
• Trips to Marineland as often as possible for Chloe
• Put curtains up in the Master Bedroom to keep out the heat of the morning sun
• Kayaking for all of the kids
• Stripping and staining the front door
• Walk every day regardless of the weather
• A concert or two
• Sell steaks for Cole's hockey team fundraiser
• OELC overnight camp for Cole
• BBQ as often as possible
• Robotics day camp for Caden
• Stripping and staining the back deck
• Selling spots in the upcoming Golf Tournament to support Cole's hockey team (so, if you want in, call me ... please!)
• Family trip to Cape Cod (only 5 days, but we'll take what we can get)
• Chloe and Caden will be swimming over at the Trafalgar Park pool
• Eat lots of juice popsicles
• Outrigger Canoe Camp at Appleby for Claire (councellor) and Cole (participant). Hmm
• Visits with my sister and her kids who have just moved to Oakville
• Eat fresh local fruit and vegetables
• Purge and organize garage and storage for a fall garage sale/fundraiser
• Biking all over the neighbourhood
• Theatre camps for Chloe, though I'm still looking for good one!
• Picnics at Shell Park and under our big maple tree
• BOOKS, each one of us has at least a half-dozen to read
• Wear sunscreen
• Hockey preparation clinics, camps and tournaments for Cole
• Renovating the basement bathroom
• Trips to Butterfly Ice Cream and Coldstone Creamery
• Golf is always on the list of things to do but we never manage to do it, hopefully that changes this year, at least a time or two
• Make crafts and start some decorating projects
• Relax

How's that for some unstructured structure?

Whatever your plans, I hope you have a wonderful time :)

*8 Things: Triggers

While visiting the Happiest Mom she had an interesting article that got me thinking.  Then she asked at the end "What are your Cranky Mom triggers? Have you learned to identify and avoid some of them?"

I have to admit, by the end of May, maybe due to the full moon, but my triggers were going off all over the place. I suppose with six people under the same roof, the odds are great that some days will be more stressful than others.

My triggers:

1. Late. Don't be late. Don't make me late.
2. Dishes left in the sink. The dishwasher is RIGHT THERE. Oh, and if the dishwasher is full of clean dishes EMPTY IT.
3. Calls/e-mails from school to bring something forgotten. The last question mama asks when you leave the house is: do you have everything? keys? homework? lunch? If you say yes then why am I going to school mid-day?
4. Towels on the floor, bikes left in the rain, equipment in three different places. Put your stuff AWAY! Grr.
5. Ignoring the 24 hour rule. This is a long-standing rule that I need 24 hours notice of a kid activity. Do not ask me, especially in front of your little friend, if you can do XYZ in 15 minutes. And, definitely do not have a SNIT FIT when I say "no".
6. Instant answers are not available. Do not be in possession of critical information an then expect me to give an instant answer when it is finally shared with me. I think everyone is realizing that I'm not into surprises or spontaneous anything!
7. My stuff. Do not "borrow" my stuff because in reality you steal it as I never see it again: make up, notebooks, tweezers, books, camera, flash cards (!!), brushes, scrapbook supplies, all manner of things I need throughout the day. Take the pots, pans, and cooking sheets instead!
8. Laundry is done by me, not the laundry fairy. Even though I enjoy doing it, please do not send clean clothes to the laundry room. I know that you haven't worn it and you were just too lazy to put it away properly. (I do laundry, I do not do put-away.) By the same token, if it is on your floor, it cannot be in the wash. Hnm?

The second question was whether or not I have learned to identify them (clearly, yes) and avoid them (clearly, no).

Why can't I avoid them? I'm not sure if my kids enjoy me losing my temper or if they're stupid and lazy - which I know they are not. Sometimes. Maybe. I'll chalk it up to young.

The real question is how do I cope? Well, my usual answer would be WINE. But, as part of the Boost Energy portion of my Happiness Project, in order to sleep better I've cut out the wine consumption. 100%. So, now I cope the old fashioned way, I count to 10 and if that doesn't work, I send them to clean their rooms :) ETA: the counting didn't work, I'm back to drinking wine and seriously considering putting in some ear buds and wearing a blindfold to get through my days!

Hmm. Maybe we've discovered the real trigger for my being cranky?

What about you. What sets you off? Are you able to avoid it?

SOOC Saturday: Cedars

I love my convertible. I especially love that it doesn't just look good, it's practical :) Louis found a great deal over at Canadian Tire on some Emerald Cedars - $20 each reduced from $50. Gotta love a 60% deal. So six of those babies are now in our back yard after the trip home, all strapped in nice and safe in the Solara.

What is your favourite SOOC (Straight Out Of Camera) shot today? You can join in: here! 

Weekend DIY Projects

Do you have weekend projects? Those things around the house that you know need to be done and can only be accomplished on Saturday and Sunday?

We have enough weekend projects throughout the house to last us a couple of years!

After reading this BRILLIANT article over at Centsational Girl, I grabbed my camera* and made a visual list of all the things that need doing outside our house. I might have to turn these into weekday projects with our summer weekends filled with rugby for Claire; football and hockey tournaments for Cole; singing for Chloe and 3on3 hockey for Caden. That and upcoming brunches and parties already in the works! Oh, and my step-sister Andrea and her family are moving into town, that will be a wonderful distraction. I figure if I can get myself to bed by 9PM and up by 5AM I can manage my work, socializing and then the projects. Who knows, I may just get everything completed by like ... October?

In no particular order:

Our front door is spectacular. It is solid wood ... I don't know what kind, but it's heavy and thick. I'm going to sand it all down since it is beyond "distressed", sand it down and stain it with a rich mahogany weather guard. 

 

See that ugly metal box with the wires? Well, it's hard to miss! When we moved into the house we thought the doorbell just had to be fixed - it turns out, the wires weren't attached to anything. We installed a new doorbell, but wer're stuck with this ugly box. I really want to find something to cover it. Ugly, eh? Link me to something pretty! Please?

The pots are still empty, so is the built-in planter with the holly. I'm thinking white impatiens or begonias with some nice trailing ivy. I've never planted before the May long weekend, but maybe I can this year?

I think our pine tree is dying. It is three storeys high and the top 8'-10' is bare. Must call someone who knows better than I!

In the winter we have small little bobcat type machines that clear the snow. Not that we had much this year! But each season on the curve it takes out half the stones. We are leaving them loose, since that way it's easier - and less expensive to fix each Spring. This has been the third year and I don't think the machine operators are improving!

Oops, got a little distracted by the sunrise!

When we had the 25' of forsythias removed last year (we still have at least 10' worth, which is still 8' too much!) it revealed two maple saplings and a gaping hole into Ben's back yard. I think I'm going to run out and get some cedars so he doesn't have to see our purple lawn :)

And, the super huge, must-be-done project:

We've got the materials and chosen the new stain. We just have to strip and re-stain. Just. I'm thinking I need to buy some more scrapers and applicators, buy a couple of cases of beer and get some help over here! Or, bribe my boys and girls with root beer? 

More pots! These are just out the kitchen door, so they'll be filled with basil, chives and parsley.

There is, of course, a bagillion other things on the go inside. I didn't show any of the Outside Louis Projects since it's my job to "prettify" and his is not. Really not. I don't know what it is he's doing, but his area of the outside is the garage zone and I don't actually fix it, though I do nag. A lot.

Wish me luck! What do you have on the go?

*All photos taken on Thursday morning. Good thing because it is POURING today. Yet another thing that will put off project completion!