I have spent an awful lot of time trying to figure out what to do with my life. Seriously, what should I DO? To make a living. To be a better person. To contribute to society. That kind of do with my life.
It turns out that my goal of being a good mum was not as far-sighted as I once thought. Not that my role as mother will ever end, but my role as ever-present mum will. That realization makes me happy and sad at the same time! As my kids need me less, I realize I had better figure out what I should do with the rest of my life. To that end I've engaged a wonderful life coach, considered many business models and ideas, I have even bought a domain name, set up a website with business cards to match!
Ugh.
I feel both defeated and excited to start, all at the same time. I'm a freaking information magpie. Then I discoverered the Daily Muse which is the WORST (read: BEST!) at giving me more things to consider. Like the article on the 50 (cheap) Professional Develop Classes Anyone Can Take. Information magpie NIRVANA!
I have followed along with people who I admire and learn from and appreciate when they "introduce" me to others who are equally talented and I often take their recommendations for projects, courses, articles. I have taken oodles of photography, writing, scrapbooking, vulnerability, blogging, photoshop, branding and self-discovery courses, primarily online, for the last decade. I regularly manage to get myself into a cycle of taking similar courses, all taught by people well qualified, but redundant in their message.
I have spent a lot of time reflecting and figuring out who I am. I will always be a work in progress, I am far too curious and like learning way too much to be content for long. Who I am, at my essense, is pretty clear and I'm okay with it. More than okay.
Now, what to do about it?
It's time to move past taking similar courses over and over again and move forward to more challenging material. The work I've done was painful, enlightening, hard and rewarding. As a result I am now completely comfortable with who I am and now have to figure how I can parlay that knowledge into a means of financial independence and creative expression.
To that end, last month I put a note out, via Facebook, to those who could provide insight into the Danielle LaPorte-recommented B-School with Maria Forleo. My virtual friend Katrina Kennedy, sent a note in support as she had taken a previous course. Now, I tell my kids ALL THE TIME that you are "judged by the company you keep" and "birds of a feather" and I'm happy to be in company of Katrina, Danielle LaPorte and even Oprah!
I am seriously behind. Sign-up for B-School coincided with my kids' ridiculously long - 18 day - March Break. I have only just clicked on the first assignment and the class is already onto the third module. That being said, I like this change in direction. It feels good. It's stirring up a whole bunch of insecurity and questions of worthiness and ability I've already addressed. It's nice to put that personal work to the test. Something I would not have been able to do if I had continued to be content just repeating the same patterns - projects and courses.
My plan moving forward is to buckle down and really focus on this investment in my future. It's looking bright!